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I'll never let go, Jack. Er, I mean Mickey. Photo [CC0] via Pxfuel & clipart-library.

Disney Magic to be sunk, turned into artificial reef

Why don't they ever sink ships to create natural reefs? PORT CANAVERAL, FL -- The Disney Magic is the latest victim of the Covid-19 shutdown. Disney Cruise Line announced today that the Magic, the first cruise ship in the Disney fleet, will be sunk and turned into an artificial reef. With the high cost of maintaining the ship during the cruise industry shutdown, the write-off will help boost Disney's bottom line. I own a share of Disney. Why don't I get these calls? Robert "Bob" Chapek, CEO, and ... Read more
New official campaign photo of Joe Rohde’s Earring, courtesy Joe Rohde’s Earring for President 2020. Photo by alchetron.com [CC BY-SA 3.0].

Joe Rohde’s Earring exposed to Covid-19, in quarantine

The Earring has to keep six feet away from Joe Rohde. BURBANK, CA -- Joe Rohde's Earring may have been exposed to a person infected with the coronavirus. The famed Imagineer fashion accessory and presidential candidate is in quarantine, and must keep at least six feet from Joe Rohde. Fortunately, Rohde's earlobe can be stretched to seven feet, so he does not have to detach the earring. The Earring has canceled all campaign appearances for the foreseeable future. No explanation was given as ... Read more
Pictured (front, L-R) Mr. Mistoffelees, Munkustrap, Macavity, Skimbleshanks (back, L-R) Jennyanydots, Grizabella, Rum Tum Tugger. Photo [CC0] via Pxhere.

DisneyNature will make a live-action version of the Cats musical

No, not CGI, or humans in costumes. Actual cats. BR'ER BANK, CA -- DisneyNature, the division of Walt Disney Studios that makes those animal movies, has announced its next project: a live action remake of the Broadway musical Cats! Paul Baribault, president of DisneyNature, is excited about the project. He spoke to Uncle Walt's Insider by phone. Straight from the (lion?) king "This will be something we've never done before," Baribault says. What, make a movie someone will actually go see, we ask? "Well, that, yes," ... Read more
A current photo of the Magic Kingdom. Screenshot of Fallout 4 (modified) from ChikaHitujiya via Twitter.

Fallout 4’s “Nuka-World” is a VR Magic Kingdom!

Pictured: screenshot of a live feed from the Magic Kingdom. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- Disney fans everywhere, deprived of the ability to visit their favorite parks, are looking for any way to get their theme park fix. They turn to YouTube for virtual rides and LEGO bricks to build their own theme parks. But one gamer has apparently discovered the "Holy Grail" -- a way to visit an exact replica of Walt Disney World as it exists today! We contacted online ... Read more
A medical team models the donated Mickey ear masks. Photo [CC0] via Pxhere.

Disney donates 600K repurposed Mickey Ear hats as medical masks

They're slow in getting to providers, though. Custom name embroidery takes time. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- Like so many businesses during this crisis, The Mad Hatter hat store at the Disneyland Theme Park and Spa is using its special skills to respond to the medical emergency. They are the staging ground for approximately 600,000 mouse-ear hats being donated to hospitals as medical masks. Great ideas from the (former) top "It was my plan from the start," said deposed CEO Bob "Robert" Chapek. "I thought ... Read more