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Photo of Vault Disney courtesy of Disney, duh.

Disney classics not yet made into sequels

We help Disney to know what movies to make next. UNCLE WALT'S H.Q., SVALBARD -- With Christopher Robin still in theaters, Mary Poppins Returns coming in December, and announcement of a new live action Song of the South, you may be asking, what's left of Disney's classic films? What other movies from their history could they possibly remake or add a sequel to? Well, our crack team of researchers here at our Longyearbyen headquarters [Ed.: where it's illegal to die, by the way] have assembled a list ... Read more
Miss Tilly before and after restoration. Before photo by Matthew Hull via wdwinfo.com. After photo courtesy of Magnolia Shrimping Ltd.

Miss Tilly repaired, returns to shrimping

Typhoon Lagoon's iconic shipwreck is fully restored and renovated! PORT SALERNO, FL -- It's a boat that is very familiar to fans of the Walt Disney World Resort's Typhoon Lagoon water park. Miss Tilly is a shrimp boat that was deposited on the top of Mount Mayday after 1989's storm, a storm that also conveniently created the ideal conditions for a water park. The Miss Tilly has been perched on top of the mountain ever since, useless and decaying. Until this year. It's a bit of a Fixer ... Read more
Song of the South: the Ride. Photo by Joe Penniston [CC BY-NC-ND 2.0] via Flickr.

Controversy: Disney announces live-action Song of the South

Every other animated feature has had a live remake, so now it's Song of the South's turn. BURBANK, CA - Continuing with its latest business model of remaking beloved animated features, Disney announced that it had begun production of a live-action reboot of the 1946 classic Song of the South. "We feel that this reboot has been necessary for decades," said ABC Disney spokesperson Stephen White. "While the film has received a lot of flack for expressing old sentiments, we'd like to retell the story ... Read more
Not-So-Magical Porthole aboard the Disney Dreamship. Photo © 2012 Disney, if you can still believe anything they say.

DCL disappointment: Magic Portholes do not actually use magic

A four-year undercover investigation reveals the truth. CELEBRATION, FL -- The Walt Disney Company uses the word "magic" a lot -- the Magic Kingdom Park; their first cruise ship, the Disney Magic; the Remember the Magic parade; the "magic underwear" worn by Cast Members who work with characters in the parks so they never have to take potty breaks; and that whole Disney's Magical Wizarding World of Harry Potter thing. But to what extent do they actually use magic? Uncle Walt's investigates As our ... Read more
Disney's Go Away Green - building, speaker, Club 33 door, & Phil

Disney licenses “Go Away Green” to military

Pictured uses of Go Away Green (L-R): 1. show building. 2. speaker. 3. Club 33 door. 4. Phil. BURBANK, CA -- For decades Disney Imagineers have been painting buildings and objects within their parks a dusky shade of bluish-green they call "Go Away Green." It's a color whose entire purpose is to not draw attention, so it can be found on speakers, employees-only gates, a certain Cast Member named Phil that no one likes, and most famously, the original door to the secretive ... Read more