"If only we'd known."
BURBANK, CA -- Newly minted Disney CEO Bob "Robert" Chapek is kicking himself right now. (Figuratively, we presume.) The problem? The inexpensive pricing of Disney+, the Mouse's new streaming service.
"It's the whole supply and demand thing," Chapek told Uncle Walt's Insider. "We set the price really low to entice people to subscribe -- and it worked, at least until season one of The Mandalorian ended. We set the price low to drive up demand."
Nothing to do but watch
It's like Superman and Clark Kent, but with an earring instead of glasses.
BURBANK, CA -- You heard it here first! Based on our exhaustedive investigative reporting, Uncle Walt's Insider can now reveal that famed Disney Imagineer Joe Rohde and celebrated director and member of Monty Python Terry Gilliam are in fact the same person.
This conclusion is based on solid evidence:
1. They look alike.
Seriously, look at those photos. Okay, two different people, right?
But NOW, cover up Joe's left earlobe ...
Also, run a virus scan on your computer before visiting Uncle Walt's Insider.
UNCLE WALT'S INSIDER H.Q., SVALBARD -- First, the good news: COVID-19 has not infected any Uncle Walt's Insider staff. You could say it's because of the precautions we're taking, but let's be honest. People have been "socially distancing" themselves from us long before this current situation.
We've never been the types to follow a crowd, but with everyone putting out an official Coronavirus policy, we figured we'd better get one ...
We can't believe they're letting these properties go!
BURBANK, CA -- The Walt Disney Company is apparently having budget shortfalls, what with the extended closure of Hong Kong Disneyland and Shanghai Disney Resort over concerns about COVID-19 (Coronavirus). Consequently, they have announced that they would be selling off some assets.
Newly appointed CEO Bob "Bobby Cutbacks" Chapek sent out a press release announcing the sales.
List of items for sale
Uncle Walt's Insider staff carefully read through the 38 page list of assets that ...
Have we been underestimating the lovable man-dog-thing all these years?
BALTIMORE, MD -- According to a study published in the New Old England Journal of Medicine, Goofy is not the bumbling fool that we've all thought he was. In fact, he's actually a genius!
The author of the study, a fellow at the Johns Hopkins School of Medicine and Spa, says the conclusion was made after carefully studying every Goofy cartoon ever made. While the paper is filled with medical jargon that ...