Spotlight Archives - Uncle Walt's Insider
Maybe they'll call it "Monstro's Whale Tail" for a while. Photo © Disney, Carnival Corp., maybe.

Carnival Corporation buys Disney Cruise Line

We can't wait for Goofy's Belly Flop Contest. DORAL, FL -- In a surprising move, returning Disney CEO Bob "Bob" Iger has agreed to unload Disney Cruise Line, selling its ships, branding, and assets to cruise mega-corporation Carnival. Disney Cruise Line will become another of Carnival Corporation's current stable of 27 cruise brands, which already include Carnival, Princess, Holland America, Seabourn, P&O, Costa, Six Flags, SpaceX, Cedar Fair, and Kroger. Uncle Walt's Insider has learned that, at least for now, the former Disney ... Read more
Bob, and Bob. Not pictured: Bob. Photo credit: Getty Images.

Disney boss Iger reversing bad decisions by former CEO Chapek

Apparently Chapek didn't go far enough? BURBANK, CA -- As we predicted, Bob "Bob" Iger has returned as CEO of the Disney Company. In his first week, Iger announced he will reverse all of the poor decisions he blamed on Bob "Bob" Chapek, returning Disney to its full glory. With our incredible inside contacts and sources [Ed.: Wait, Google counts as an inside source?], Uncle Walt's Insider is able to give you a first look at the list of decision changes. They ... Read more
The future CEO of Disney? Photo by Neon Tommy [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Wikimedia.

Lane Kiffin confirms interest in Disney CEO job

This gives us an idea for an article series... OXFORD, MS -- Ole Miss football coach Lane Kiffin is interested in taking a new job as the CEO of The Walt Disney Company, sources tell Uncle Walt's Insider. Per a tweet from an unnamed ESPN Staffer [Ed.: Tell me it's not Herbie again. Please do not say Kirk Herbstreit!] named Kirk [Ed.: Dang it.], Coach Kiffin is currently reaching out to Disney company representatives about the opportunity. As usual, we're ahead of these rumors. ... Read more

An Open Letter to Bob Iger

Let's go, Brandon? Absolutely not. UNCLE WALT'S INSIDER H.Q., SVALBARD-- Dear Bob, Can we call you Bob? We feel like we've known each other for years. Plus, you strike us as a somewhat informal type of person. But, anyways, we wanted to offer you some advice. We know you're going to get tons of advice rolling in from everywhere. You've got a tall task. Only 2 years to figure out a worthy successor to the title of CEO of The Walt Disney Company. We ... Read more
Meet the newest Disney Imagineer. Photo © 2021 Google / Street View.

Elon Musk to purchase Uncle Walt’s Insider

He wanted to buy the Babylon Bee, but that's actually worth something. UNCLE WALT'S INSIDER H.Q., SVALBARD -- Fresh off his purchase (and purge) of Twitter, billionaire Elon Musk announced today his plans to purchase Uncle Walt's Insider. The move comes after his first attempt to buy a news satire site, The Babylon Bee, fell through, due to the Bee "actually being worth something." While the final purchase details for Uncle Walt's have not been disclosed (unlike Twitter, U.W.I. is not a publicly ... Read more