X, Author at Uncle Walt's Insider
The change will, of course, come with a price increase. Photo by Coolcaesar [CC BY-SA 4.0] via Wikimedia.

Disney hires Pepsi CFO; menu changes coming soon?

Will Disney replace the current overpriced sugar water with worse overpriced sugar water? BURBANK, CA -- In a recent corporate shuffle, the Walt Disney Company welcomed Hugh Johnston, the former CFO of PepsiCo, as their new Chief Financial Officer. While the financial world buzzes with this significant appointment, whispers suggest that there might be a subtle yet significant change brewing within Disney's iconic parks. The relationship between Disney and Coca-Cola has been as enduring as a timeless fairy tale, interwoven in the fabric ... Read more
Maybe they'll call it "Monstro's Whale Tail" for a while. Photo © Disney, Carnival Corp., maybe.

Is Disney tracking guests via “NSA” desserts?

The intelligence community is really into sugar-free cooking, apparently. CASTAWAY CAY, BAHAMAS -- Picture yourself aboard the magnificent Disney Fantasy cruise ship, where dreams come true, enchantment knows no bounds, and your bank account never recovers. Amidst the grandeur and wonder, an unexpected twist unfolds – you spy [Heh] a mysterious dessert labeled "NSA Apple Turnovers" in Cabana's buffet. What gives? While Disney insists that "NSA" stands for "No Sugar Added," rumors abound that this sweet dessert reveals a secret alliance with the ... Read more
Wait, who was taking this picture? Photo by U.S. Indo-Pacific Command [CC BY-NC-ND 2.0] via Flickr; inset photo by Kjersti Holmang [CC BY-SA 4.0] via Wikipedia.

Accidental nuclear launch traced to Hall of Presidents

We told you not to bring nuclear launch codes to the Magic Kingdom! USS TENNESSEE, ATLANTIC OCEAN-- In a shocking turn of events, a nuclear missile was accidentally launched from the USS Tennessee in the Atlantic Ocean yesterday. The apparent culprit? None other than the Joe Biden audio-animatronic at Walt Disney World's Hall of Presidents. The animatronic Biden and former presidents had recently been upgraded to connect to the AI system ChatGPT. "We thought that adding ChatGPT would make the Hall of Presidents more lifelike ... Read more

Iger’s Replacement: The Final Countdown

It's the ultimate battle for the top spot at Disney! DISNEYLAND, DEMOCRATIC PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC OF KALIFORNIA -- It's finally here! Earlier we reported that Disney would be looking at internal candidates to replace Bob Iger as the CEO. And then we announced that it had been narrowed down to two candidates. We can now report that, just before publication, we watched the live stream of the two final candidates. Rather than just tell you the outcome, as a service to you, here ... Read more

Iger on Disney CEO search: “And then there were two”

Who could the two candidates be? BURBANK, CA -- As previously reported, Disney CEO Bob "Bob" Iger has deemed that the next CEO of the Walt Disney Company will be an internal candidate. We haven't heard much news in the intervening time, all our sources have been unusually tight lipped. But today, we got an anonymous email from someone in the Broadcast Production office.  Anonymous email "They've narrowed it down to two candidates. The final interview will be with both of them this Friday, April 14. ... Read more