Even malfunctioning, it's still more coherent than the real thing.
WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- Disney Parks, Resorts & Spas officials have "taken advantage of a unique time in history," Uncle Walt's Insider has learned.
"We know that there have been a flurry of executive orders being signed by Biden," said our source, who wishes to remain anonymous. Disney (no relation) continued, "And we have a Biden animatronic in the Hall of Presidents, and a resort in California that's been shut down for ...
And then they invited us to stay for dinner!
MIDDLE OF THE JUNGLE -- As Disney fans react to the announcement from Disney about the upcoming changes to the beloved ride The Jungle Cruise, Uncle Walt's Insider reached out to a previously un-contacted tribe to get their reaction.
Initially we were concerned when the men of the tribe approached us with bows and spears, but after Uncle Walt offered them churros, we think we were welcomed as part of the tribe. It appears ...
It's 100% effective at stopping the virus, and can be made with common household materials.
COLLEGE STATION, TX -- This may be the break Disneyland officials have been waiting for! Researchers at the Texas A&M University Department of Biotechnology and Concrete Husbandry have announced a new masking solution that is 100% effective at preventing the spread of Covid-19.
"It's so simple, we don't know why we didn't think of it before," says A&M (the college) spokesperson Jun Aggie (no relation). "We've been using ...
It's being temporarily renamed "Pirate's Covid at Tom Sawyer Island"
ANAHEIM, CA -- Stymied in their efforts to open their theme parks, Disney has joined the fight against Covid-19.
The Disney Company announced today that Tom Sawyer Island at the Disneyland Park will become a Covid-19 ward. Disney has already outfitted the island with the necessary medical equipment and trained Cast Members to handle Covid-19 patients.
They won't put patients in Dead Man's Grotto, will they?
A temporary bridge is being constructed to get ...