And then they invited us to stay for dinner!
MIDDLE OF THE JUNGLE -- As Disney fans react to the announcement from Disney about the upcoming changes to the beloved ride The Jungle Cruise, Uncle Walt's Insider reached out to a previously un-contacted tribe to get their reaction.
Initially we were concerned when the men of the tribe approached us with bows and spears, but after Uncle Walt offered them churros, we think we were welcomed as part of the tribe. It appears ...
It's 100% effective at stopping the virus, and can be made with common household materials.
COLLEGE STATION, TX -- This may be the break Disneyland officials have been waiting for! Researchers at the Texas A&M University Department of Biotechnology and Concrete Husbandry have announced a new masking solution that is 100% effective at preventing the spread of Covid-19.
"It's so simple, we don't know why we didn't think of it before," says A&M (the college) spokesperson Jun Aggie (no relation). "We've been using ...
It's being temporarily renamed "Pirate's Covid at Tom Sawyer Island"
ANAHEIM, CA -- Stymied in their efforts to open their theme parks, Disney has joined the fight against Covid-19.
The Disney Company announced today that Tom Sawyer Island at the Disneyland Park will become a Covid-19 ward. Disney has already outfitted the island with the necessary medical equipment and trained Cast Members to handle Covid-19 patients.
They won't put patients in Dead Man's Grotto, will they?
A temporary bridge is being constructed to get ...
Maybe cloth face masks filter out the magic?
WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- Fans of the Walt Disney World Resort & Spa are still reeling over the loss of the Magical Express and Extra Magic Hours [Ed.: And pavement]. But like seemingly everything else these days, there is worse news behind the bad news.
Disney has almost completely exhausted its store of magic.
"We've been draining our magic supplies like crazy in the past few months," confesses Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney ...
The logo changes are so subtle. Can you spot them?
ANAHEIM, CA -- Disney's recent attempt to re-open Disneyland as an autonomous zone has failed, Uncle Walt's Insider can now report. Governor Gavin Newsom (D) quickly saw that the change was making his subjects freer and happier without authorization by his regime, so he quickly had his foot soldiers shut down the parks.
In what we are sure is a complete coincidence, Disney has unveiled a new logo for the Disneyland Resort. ...