Florida Archives - Uncle Walt's Insider
Realistic crash test dummies, reportedly all with GPP (Genuine People Personalities). Photo credits: wdwmagic.com via interpark.co.uk.

Disney testing new lifelike crash test dummies in Tomorrowland

"Your plastic pal who's fun to be with!" BAY LAKE, FLORIDA -- On Monday, the Disney blogosphere went into overdrive after supposedly spotting a top secret preview of the new Tron Lightcycle Run attraction at Disney's Magic Kingdom.  However, Uncle Walt's Insider can confirm it was not a preview. Instead, Disney is testing out new top secret ride test dummies that are apparently incredibly lifelike. We got a text from our favorite Disney (the company) spokesperson, Jun Disney (no relation), who said, "Ignore what you ... Read more
Bob, and Bob. Not pictured: Bob. Photo credit: Getty Images.

Disney boss Iger reversing bad decisions by former CEO Chapek

Apparently Chapek didn't go far enough? BURBANK, CA -- As we predicted, Bob "Bob" Iger has returned as CEO of the Disney Company. In his first week, Iger announced he will reverse all of the poor decisions he blamed on Bob "Bob" Chapek, returning Disney to its full glory. With our incredible inside contacts and sources [Ed.: Wait, Google counts as an inside source?], Uncle Walt's Insider is able to give you a first look at the list of decision changes. They ... Read more
We suspect Bob took the new sign home with him. Photo by Michael Gray [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Wikimedia, & by Disney.

Exclusive: The real reason Chapek was fired!

OnlyFans sponsoring Spaceship Earth? It was a step too far. LAKE BUENA VISTA, FL -- In a move that brought tears of joy to Disney fans around the globe, Bob "Bob" Chapek has been fired as CEO of The Walt Disney Company. Reactions ranged from a ticker-tape parade to one Facebook user saying, "So sad to hear about Chapek. I just can’t stop grinning." But the reason given publicly for his firing (his name being drawn at random from a big lotto ... Read more
PhotoPass photographers are going to have a tough time getting them to stand still when the wind blows. Photo by Walmart.com.

Disney to replace live characters with inflatables

More of Chapek creating magic! (For his accountants.) WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- The Walt Disney World Resort is known for its world class hotels, restaurants, and theme parks. It's also the place where children of all ages can meet their favorite characters, such as Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, Goofy, and Ensign Thomas Garland. But as Uncle Walt's Insider has learned, there are some changes coming to the character-meet experience. In a recent interview, Disney CEO Bob "Bob" Chapek discussed his history ... Read more

Citing “too many poor people here,” Disney raises prices… again

Also, the unnamed executive's ringtone was a "cha-ching" sound, over and over again. BURBANK, CA -- On a recent visit to Disneyland, an unidentified Disney executive (pictured) was overheard saying that there are "too many poor people here." The unnamed executive suggested that Disneyland should be like a country club: overpriced, exclusive, and offer mediocre experiences at a premium price. So, as you might expect, we at Uncle Walt's Insider predict more price increases coming to Disney parks. (We also have successfully predicted ... Read more