Don't look at the cover photo. Disney may soon charge you for it.
BURBANK, CA -- In its latest move towards Total Domination of All MediaTM, the Disney Company has acquired ownership and all publishing rights in the "lady yelling at cat" meme.
Sources say that the company is still considering how best to use the property. It's early in the process, but there may be a lady/cat feature film, a new series on Disney+, or a new land at Disney's Animal Kingdom ...
"The emptiness of space is very much a focus of my brain," -- AOC, probably
EPCOT, FL -- In the midst of Epcot's many issues -- closings, construction, apartment complexes -- comes a new hiccup: government meddling. Yes, now even the new Space 220 restaurant is in jeopardy after a U.S. Representative questioned its safety.
Congresswomanperson Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-Neptune) recently sent a letter to the Walt Disney Company demanding to know more about the orbit of the upcoming Space 220 restaurant. Her letter ...
Out with the King James Version, in with the drums and smoke machines.
ORLANDO, FL -- Orlando's #1 [Ed.: Hashtag 1? What does that mean?] tourist attraction, The Holy Land Experience, is making even more drastic changes to grow their attendance. In addition to adding new thrill rides, the park is also changing signage and updating costumes. They hope to attract a younger generation by moving from being a "traditional" to a "contemporary" Bible-based destination.
Holy Land Experience (the theme park) representative, ...
Finally, a true Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow!
WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- "It's not a money grab. No, no. We're just fulfilling Walt's original vision for E.P.C.O.T.!"
That's the official word from Disney (the company)'s spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation), following news that Spaceship Earth will be converting to a residential apartment block.
"I know we previously planned to make Spaceship Earth into a Death Star," Disney (no relation) explains. "But we found that it's remarkably difficult to get permits for a planet-killing ...
They're really in demand. We should make a killing.
UNCLE WALT'S INSIDER H.Q., SVALBARD -- Our readers have been clamoring for new additions to the Uncle Walt's Insider Online Mercantile, especially since we've run out of "Surf Svalbard" t-shirts and autographed Baby Yoda plushes. And so we proudly announce the following additions to our store:
Rise of the Resistance Boarding Passes
For folks planning a visit to either Disney's Hollywood Studios in Florida or Disneyland in Disneyland, the new Star Wars attraction is a ...