Florida Archives | Page 5 of 98 | Uncle Walt's Insider
A few of the non-Disney gondolas. Photo by DisneyTouristBlog.com, used by permission, modified.

To prevent virus, Skyliner cars will be hermetically sealed

Officials were inspired by the new Disneyland masks. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- The Walt Disney World Resort and Spa and Biological Warfare Factory has had its share of odd rules over the last year. To combat the pandemic, park officials have required guests to fully immerse themselves in hand sanitizer, prohibited wearing gators (presumably just on the face), and have enforced social distancing on it's a small world dolls. But the latest step may be the oddest yet. "We're completely sealing the ... Read more
Disney's "Harmonious" weather-control devices. Photo courtesy of DisneyTouristBlog.com, used by permission.

Disney moves weather control machines into World Showcase Lagoon

Finally, proof of the long-rumored Disney weather technology. E.P.C.O.T. CENTRE, FL -- As Disney struggles with the dome over Walt Disney World, they have made the bold move to bring the machines they use to control the weather into full view of guests. The devices were originally thought to be part of a new nighttime spectacular rumored to debut at EPCOT [Ed.: Can't believe fireworks were cancelled under this woke culture]. But Uncle Walt's Insider can now confirm that the new structures in ... Read more
"Father," in the middle of a racist and homophobic rant, probably. Photo by SteamFan [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia.

Another attraction gets woke – meet the new “Carousel of Progressives”

Welcome guest contributor Vier Eiken to Uncle Walt's Insider! No, he's not getting paid. BAY LAKE, FL -- The Walt Disney World Resort, Spa, Jello Factory, and Dog Track announced today that, in keeping with its commitment to inclusion and tolerance, the "Carousel of Progress" will be reimagined. The newly updated attraction will reopen in May after extensive changes. We reached out to Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation), who was able to confirm the upcoming changes. While full details were ... Read more
The newly-colorized Leave a Legacy Memorial Markers at E.P.C.O.T. C.E.N.T.R.E. Photo courtesy Disney Tourist Blog, used by permission.

Leave a Legacy tombstones return to EPCOT

Apparently they found a found a licensed funeral director willing to help. EXPERIMENTAL PROTOTYPE COMMUNITY OF TOMMOROW CENTER, FL -- In a move that has shocked a few people, Disney has returned the "Leave a Legacy" monoliths to the front of the Epcot Centre Center. The monoliths, which were removed starting in 2018, have been relocated from inside the park to outside the main entrance. The Leave a Legacy monoliths were often referred to as tombstones. However, Disney executives have repeatedly denied that ... Read more
Cover photo: Our first robot president signs another diktat. Photo by WillMcC [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia / ABC News.

Disney’s Biden animatronic signs Executive Order reopening Disneyland!

Even malfunctioning, it's still more coherent than the real thing. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- Disney Parks, Resorts & Spas officials have "taken advantage of a unique time in history," Uncle Walt's Insider has learned. "We know that there have been a flurry of executive orders being signed by Biden," said our source, who wishes to remain anonymous. Disney (no relation) continued, "And we have a Biden animatronic in the Hall of Presidents, and a resort in California that's been shut down for ... Read more