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An average evening's crowd in Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge. Video still from Letsee Media via Vimeo.

Disneyland sees spike in Light Saber injuries

Pictured: a typical evening crowd in Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge. DISNEYLAND, CA -- Disneyland Resort and Spa in Anaheim, CA, used to have a perfect record when it came to accidents involving Light Sabers. In fact, in the entire 64-year history of Disneyland Park, records show that not a single person reported an injury from a Light Saber. Blaster misfires, yes; accidental Force-chokes, sure. Those could hardly be avoided. Over the past seven days, there have been 107 reported Light Saber injuries at ... Read more
The too-awesome-for-words Churro Light Saber. Photo [CC0] via PxHere & KissPNG.

Bowing to demand, Disney now sells Churro Light Sabers

We get results. DISNEYLAND, CA -- The Disney Company has seen the light and will now sell Churro Light Sabers! Just two days after Uncle Walt's Insider broke the news that the "build your own light saber" experience at the new Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge did not include that option, the company announced the change. You're welcome. Nobel? Pulitzer? We should win all the awards for this, right? Let us know in the comments below! Need more Uncle Walt's in your life? Be sure to ... Read more
No toilets visible at Galaxy's Edge. Photo courtesy Disney.

First reaction to Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge: “Meh”

Our panel was not that impressed. DISNEYLAND, CA -- The highly-anticipated Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge has been open for a day, and the first impressions are rolling in: Yawn. That's right, apparently it's just okay, but nothing too exciting. Uncle Walt's Insider assembled a six-person panel of first-day Galaxy's Edge visitors to give us their reactions (mainly because someone here slept late and didn't get us first-day reservations like he promised, Ub.) We'll use their real names because thinking up fake ones is work. Panel discussion Uncle ... Read more
Some new place opening soon in Disney Parks. First we've heard of it. Photo courtesy Disney.

Exclusive photos from Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge! (((placeholder article)))

It's here! We give you the inside look at <<new thing>>! PLACE, STATE -- [Ed.: Marty, the new Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge land opens at Disneyland on Friday, May 31. I've set this article up to publish on that date. BE SURE to fill it in with updates, photos, and information before it runs! Don't screw this up!] [Marty: I won't let you down, boss!] <<Generic reader question to make it seem we care what they think>>? Let us know in the comments below! Need ... Read more
Concept art for new Space: 1999 - Constellation's Border land at two Six Flags parks. Photo by Chris [CC BY-NC-SA 2.0] via Flickr.

Six Flags announces new land: “Space: 1999 – Constellation’s Border”

"It's not a ripoff of Galaxy's Edge, because Space: 1999 wasn't a ripoff of Star Wars." GRAND PRAIRIE, TX -- "It's like nothing you've ever seen before." That's the official word from Six Flags (the company) spokesperson Jun Flags (no relation) about the new lands coming to Six Flags Over Georgia and Six Flags Magic Mountain. "When I say 'It's like nothing you've ever seen before,' I mean that literally," says Flags (no relation), "and can legally continue to say it until Friday when ... Read more