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The entrance arch to the newly-renamed "Orlando Magic Kingdom." Photo by Ivan Curra [CC BY-SA-3.0] via Wikimedia.

Disney adds corporate sponsor for the renamed “Orlando Magic Kingdom”

Nothing like a sponsor to make up for lost profits. AMWAY CENTER, FL -- Amid financial losses and decreased attendance, The Walt Disney Company has turned to corporate sponsorship to make up some of the shortfall. Corporate sponsorship, of course, is nothing new to Disney. However, for the first time ever, an entire park will be sponsored. Disney has announced that Walt Disney World's Magic Kingdom will now be known as "The Orlando Magic Kingdom." Something about Basketball Uncle Walt's Insider was [Ed.: the ... Read more
Alphonso Ribeiro statue at Disney's Ribeiro Resort. Photo by Summer Hull/The Points Guy, modified slightly.

Rumors fly about “Disney’s Ribeiro Resort”

It's not unusual to be loved by anyone. But it is unusual for our articles. UNCLE WALT'S H.Q., SVALBARD -- We recently received a cryptic email from an anonymous [Ed.: Hi Bob!] source, deep within the Walt Disney Company. The source wrote simply, "You should write an article about Disney's Ribeiro Resort." That was it. The entire email. Not really a lot to go on, but hey, we're award-winning journalists. We can uncover the rest of the story ourselves. We were able ... Read more
We're disappointed. We thought we'd be able to see the potato. Photo [CC0] via Pikist.

Frozen 33-1/3 and more, coming soon to Disney+!

Since the Mulan remake is such a success, here are more smash hits coming to Disney+! MY LIVING ROOM -- In the biggest news since introduction of the potato cam, the Disney Company has announced the next several months of releases for their streaming service, Disney+. We've gone through and compiled a list of all the titles you probably missed when you looked. Lesser Known Films, Remakes, Sequels Beauty and the Beats - Emma Watson reprises her role as Belle, in this live action ... Read more
In a heartwarming moment from Angels in the Outfield (1994), a young Joseph Gordon-Levitt shows Danny Glover where the team should move. Photo © 1994 Disney.

L.A. Angels are NOT leaving California

Who? ANAHEIM, CA -- In a time when thousands of attractions are fleeing the state of California (here, here, here, here, and here), one team dares to be different. The Anaheim Los Angeles [english: "The Angels"] Angels of Anaheim have announced that they will NOT be leaving the state of California.  In a press conference yesterday, a spokesperson for The The Angels Angels confirmed the decision. Who Cares? The spokesperson, who identified himself as "Head Angel Al" (and who looks suspiciously like Christopher Lloyd), admitted, "We thought about moving, ... Read more
Madame Leota is pretty socially distanced inside a crystal ball. Is the mask really necessary? Photo by Cory Doctorow [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Flickr.

BREAKING: Haunted Mansion COVID overlay?

You can't tell if the grim ghosts are grinning behind their face masks. UNCLE WALT'S H.Q., SVALBARD -- With fans still reeling from the many changes to Disney parks, Uncle Walt's Insider has just learned of more to come. There are potential drastic changes to the Haunted Mansion attraction on their way, incorporating the COVID virus into the ride! Is nothing sacred? Won't someone think of the children? Our source We received an email from a faithful reader who wishes to remain anonymous. Well, we ... Read more