We assume the deal includes the parks. City parks, that is.
CUPERTINO, CA -- In a recently leaked memo from CEO Tim "Bob" Cook, it appears that Apple, the first company to hit $3 Trillion in valuation, is poised to spend some of their stockpiled cash on acquiring Disney! Fans of Mickey Mouse dismayed by our misleading headline need not worry, however.
In the leaked memo, Cook allegedly says, "Disney, Oklahoma, has a low population, and our research has shown that it would ...
We fear the Coca-Cola ad is only the beginning.
What's that? A cheery instrumental version of Chim Chim Chiree is coming from your TV? It must be a new commercial for Walt Disney World! Except it's not -- it's an ad for Coca-Cola. And then you hear Bear Necessities... in an ad for Door Dash? What's going on?
Your ears do not deceive you -- you actually have heard Disney songs popping up in non-Disney places. Which means one thing: Disney CEO Bob ...
You put your Elon in, you take your Chapek out... Admit it, you started to sing that.
BURBANK, CA -- According to several unreliable news outlets, former Disney CEO Bob "Bob" Iger is set to take over for Bob "Bob" Chapek as CEO of the Disney company. These reports cite numerous complaints against Chapek, but mainly his overuse of the word "magical" [Ed.: Especially all those "magical" new fees for guests, right?]
Despite these hopeful rumors of a triumphant return of Bob "Bob" Iger ...
You might want to check your credit card for unexpected charges if you do one of those "blue carpet" events.
BURBANK, CA -- Disney+ Day has arrived! To celebrate the streaming service's second anniversary, Disney is rolling out the "blue carpet" for its guests, with special experiences in the parks, deals on shopDisney.com, and, oh yeah, increasing the price for a monthly Disney+ subscription to $49.99.
Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation) talked with Uncle Walt's Insider about the new ...
We're guessing there's also a subplot about Mafia hitmen.
BURBANK, CA -- In another brilliant move under the guidance of Bob "Bob" Chapek, Disney has announced an all-new, original feature film coming to Disney+: Weekend at Walt's!
Chapek told Uncle Walt's Insider, "Disney fans want to see original movies and series -- they practically beg us! We of course listened, and in the past few years we've created and released many, many original movies, like the realistic version of the Lion King. ...