Uncle Walt's Insider Other Archives - Page 2 of 49

BREAKING: Bob Chapek in as new Twitter CEO

Well, he was available. SAN FRANCISCO, CA -- As promised, "Chief Twit" Elon Musk has honored the results of a poll of Twitter users and is stepping down as CEO of the social media company. And in confirming his departure, Musk also announced that recently-deposed Disney executive Bob "Bob" Chapek will be taking his place. "I was looking for someone who would continue to annoy both employees and customers," Musk explained, "and Chapek certainly has a strong history of doing just that." As his ...

We suspect Bob took the new sign home with him. Photo by Michael Gray [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Wikimedia, & by Disney.

Exclusive: The real reason Chapek was fired!

OnlyFans sponsoring Spaceship Earth? It was a step too far. LAKE BUENA VISTA, FL -- In a move that brought tears of joy to Disney fans around the globe, Bob "Bob" Chapek has been fired as CEO of The Walt Disney Company. Reactions ranged from a ticker-tape parade to one Facebook user saying, "So sad to hear about Chapek. I just can’t stop grinning." But the reason given publicly for his firing (his name being drawn at random from a big lotto ...

November 25, 2022 by Ub in Florida, Other

Bob "Bob," about to take his toys and go home. Photo by elisfkc2 [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Wikimedia.

Chapek Nov. 11: “We anticipate staff reductions”; Chapek today: “Dang it.”

Yay, Chapek's gone. Iger will be better. He will be better, right? Hello? BR'ER BANK, CA -- Only days after declaring that the struggling Disney Company would be facing staff reductions, a dejected Bob "Bob" Chapek was seen leaving its headquarters with a box of personal belongings (we're assuming photos with Mickey and his favorite pieces of hate mail). Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation) claims the firing of Chapek as CEO was just a bit of bad luck. "He was trying ...

November 22, 2022 by Marty in Other

Our AI's Round 3 email arrived this morning! Photo © Disney, used with permission, maybe.

Computer A.I. advances to Round 3 of planDisney panel search

If it makes it, this will be the first computer-generated personality to make it onto the panel -- that we know of. LONGYEARBYEN, SVALBARD -- The search is on for new members for the planDisney trip advice panel!* Tens of thousands of applicants have already been eliminated, and the remaining few are keeping their fingers crossed. But one potential panelist has no fingers to cross. That's because the applicant, "John Q. Disneyfan of St. Louis, Missouri," is not a person, but an ...

October 27, 2022 by Marty in Other, step-planDisney

We're really not accusing anyone. At least, not in any legally-actionable way.

UWI Story Idea Vault breached; investigation ongoing

That cover photo is just a placeholder. No accusations are being made. Yet. UNCLE WALT'S INSIDER H.Q., SVALBARD -- Uncle Walt's Insider today announced (by this article, in fact) that they are investigating a breach into their Vault of Story Ideas (known also as the Story Idea Vault, or the Idea Vault of Stories). The U.W.I. Story Idea Vault (see previous paragraph) is kept under lock and key inside the renowned Svalbard Global Seed Vault, known for its ultra-tight security.* "We're not sure who ...

October 20, 2022 by Marty in Other