It is a step up.
WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — The Walt Disney World Resort, Spa, and Money Printing Press is celebrating its 50th year of existence, along with its first year of really gouging guests for every shiny dime they have. Guests brave enough to pay all of Disney’s new extra fees to actually get in the parks have expected dazzling new entertainment to go with the upcharges.
Instead, the popular “Happily Ever After” projection and fireworks show at Magic Kingdom, which featured a montage of Disney tunes bookended by an inspiring song, has been replaced by “Enchantment,” a montage of Disney tunes bookended by a different, less inspiring song. Epcot’s glorious “Illuminations: Reflections of Earth,” a dazzling show about the history of earth and the unity of all mankind, has been replaced with “Harmonious,” a montage of Disney tunes capped by an not-very-inspiring song (with the bonus of having huge, ugly barges ruining the daytime views of World Showcase).
And at Disney’s Animal Kingdom Theme Park and Hippo Spa, they get Cast Members on jet skis pulling kites.
“KiteTails” is on its way out
Fortunately, Disney has seems to get that the “show,” called “KiteTails,” has not been well-received, and is already planning a replacement.
We caught up with Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation), after weeks of her ducking our calls.
“Sorry for being hard to reach,” Disney (no relation) said. “It’s not a great time to be a Disney (the company) spokesperson. But anyway, yeah, we just kind of phoned it in on the whole KiteTails thing. We had some kite-making material and jet skis left over from ‘Epcot Forever,’ so it seemed like the way to go. But even we have to admit it’s bombed, when our guests either leave during the show, start booing, or worse, start chanting ‘Let’s Go, Chapek.’
“The new show will debut soon,” Disney (no relation) continued. “We know this guy, Steve, who does amazing things with his hands. And he also can make animal hand shadows! He was a hit as the early replacement for Illuminations, so we know he’ll be popular here.”
Can you do amazing things with your hands? Let us know in the comments below!
Cover photo: We’d watch one of these. Photos © Disney & by Hedgehog83 [CC BY 3.0] via Wikimedia Commons.