Is it alien technology? Is it like Dr. Strange’s Sling Ring or Green Lantern’s, uh, Green Lantern Ring?
BURBANK, CA — As you may recall, Joe Rohde’s Earring (but not Rohde himself) was implicated in a few deaths in Southern California back in July. Your crack team of reporters at Uncle Walt’s Insider are happy to report that the Earring has been completely cleared.
During our investigation, however, we discovered some shocking information that may be called “fake news.” But as far as we know, this is real: Joe Rohde’s earring is sentient and may be the source of his creative powers.
As one of our undercover reporters [Ed.: It was X] tells it, while he was hiding from Disney Studio Security officers, he spotted Joe Rohde nearby in a secluded area. It appeared Rohde was talking to himself — but as
X our unnamed reporter got closer, he heard two voices, but only saw one person.
He then saw something amazing: Rohde’s Earring was floating in midair and talking.
The source of Rohde’s creative genius
The conversation between Rohde and his Earring centered around the biggest controversy in Rohde’s career, the failed Yeti. The massive animatronic in Expedition: Everest at Disney’s Animal Kingdom Theme Park and Spa has been broken for years.
According to what
X our reporter overheard, Rohde felt the Earring was gaining too much power over him, and designed the Yeti himself. The Earring was not happy to be ignored, and allowed design flaws to cripple the attraction. And until Rohde submits completely to its will, the Earring will not reveal how to repair the Yeti.
Perhaps the most shocking revelation from this encounter is that the Earring is the source of Rohde’s creative genius, and without it, he is just another hipster with a droopy earlobe working at Starbucks.
Uncle Walt’s Insider will continue to investigate this, for as long as we can remain hidden from Disney Security.
Is the Earring another symbiotic alien like Venom? Comment below!
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Cover photo of Joe Rohde and his symbiotic alien parasite by alchetron.com [CC BY-SA 3.0].