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Concept art for the new Star Wars: Rise of the Resistance attraction at LEGOland. Photo [CC0] via pxhere.

Rise of the Resistance delayed again; thanks, Kylo Ren

He really needs to learn to control his temper before he hurts someone. BLACK SPIRE OUTPOST, BATUU -- Internet and fan-driven news [Ed.: More like, FAKE news! Hah! Burn!] websites focusing on Disney have reported additional delays in the next Star Wars-themed attraction, Rise of the Resistance. It's just the latest controversy coming out of the house of Mouse. The Rise of the Resistance attraction at both the Walt Disney World Resort and Spa and Droid Factory, and the Disneyland Resort and Spa ... Read more
We found a witch. May we burn her? Screenshot via YouTube.

La Befana out at Epcot, found guilty of being a witch

Italy's representative at Epcot's Festival of the Holidays goes on trial. ITALY PAVILION, EPCOT, FL -- After a shocking ruling, well-known Christmas character La Befana will no longer appear at Epcot's Italy Pavilion and Spa during the Festival of the Holidays. The beloved storyteller has been found guilty by the Reedy Creek District Court of being a witch. Following a brief trial, in which a number of rough-clad villagers brought accusations, the court announced its decision. Uncle Walt's Insider obtained a copy ... Read more
Celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay brings his folksy, G-rated charm to Epcot. Photo by gordon-ramsay [CC BY 2.0] via Flickr.

Gordon Ramsay joins “Sunday Brunch with the Chef” at Epcot

Disney events are rarely rated For Mature Audiences Only. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- Epcot's Food and Wine Festival and Spa just got a little more interesting. Disney officials have announced that due to a "cake decorating incident," the October 6th Sunday Brunch with the Chef celebrity host Buddy Valastro will be replaced. Instead, the event will feature celebrity chef and host of Hell's Kitchen Gordon Ramsay. This last minute change may upset some attendees, but those of us who have wasted money ... Read more
The cast of Song of the South, in their Nike gear. Photo courtesy Disney (the company).

Song of the South *will* be available on Disney+

No word yet on Sunflower the centaur or Dumbo's Jim Crow. BURBANK, CA -- The Internet has been blowing up with stories about Disney+ being tested in the Netherlands. While most fans are excited to be able to stream real Disney classics like Condorman and The Boatniks, one loyal Uncle Walt's Insider fan anonymously [Thanks, Sebastiaan!] shared his findings on Disney+. Not-Sebastiaan said, "There I was swiping through all of the garbage that Disney has put out over the years, looking for real ... Read more
Kevin from Up, who is definitely a girl bird, unless xe decides otherwise. Photo by Josh Hallett [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Flickr.

Russell banned from Wilderness Explorers for misgendering Kevin

There goes his social justice merit badge, too. PARADISE FALLS -- Russell, the beloved Wilderness Explorer from the movie Up, is an Explorer no more. The latest to be targeted by the so-called "cancel culture," Russell was banned from the organization following complaints of misgendering. Kevin, the exotic bird found by Russell and Carl Fredricksen on their adventure to Paradise Falls, apparently filed a complaint with the Wilderness Explorers against Russell. A lot of people say, "Who's that?" A Wilderness Explorers spokesperson using just the single ... Read more