Feet: the original “people mover.” MAGIC KINGDOM, FL — Just in time for the amazing summer weather in Florida, officials at Walt Disney World have re-opened the Tomorrowland Transit Authority Peoplemover — after the installation of sidewalks. Disney (the company) spokesthey [Ed.: What?] Jun Disney (no relation) spoke with our imbedded reporters [Ed.: What exactly…
Will other Pavilions do the same? We’re looking at you, France. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — Goodbye, Morocco. Hello, Morrocette? Disney officials announced today that the Morocco Pavilion at the EPCOT Theme Park, Resort, Spa & Institute for Gender Studies has undergone gender reassignment surgery. The land in the World Showcase portion of the park…
![A rare photo of the sentient Speedway cars, taken just before the ride closed. Photo by Theme Park Tourist [CC BY 2.0] via Wikimedia Commons, modified.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/06/tomorrowland-speedway-cars-became-sentient-e1618499720196-768x403.jpg)
Could you program in a different destination? GLENDALE, CA — Are the cars in Disneyland’s Autopia and the Magic Kingdom’s Tomorrowland Speedway being replaced with self-driving Teslas? That what some are saying, including our own headline. An anonymous Disney insider who recently left the company [Ed.: Hi, Joe!] has leaked a document detailing a new…
![A very obviously non-mask-wearing Trader Sam. Photo by Steven Miller [CC BY 2.0] via Flickr.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/trader-sam-not-wearing-a-mask-768x403.jpg)
Next they’ll come for the non-mask wearing animals. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — When the Walt Disney World Resort and Spa re-opened last year, Disney required guests and Cast Members to wear masks 100% of the time while on WDW property. The mandate included mask-wearing while walking, running, standing, eating, drinking, sleeping, swimming, bathing, showering,…
Hopefully it won’t burn, burn, burn any of the performers. EPCOT, FL — As Disney continues work on the weather control barges at EPCOT, recent filings with the Reedy Creek Improvement District show that these barges have another purpose. It might be that they will also take part in a new nighttime show coming to…