Uncle Walt's Insider Page 70 – Uncle Walt's Insider

Non-socially distanced villains at Walt Disney World. Photo by Leigh Caldwell [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Flickr.

MNSSHP replaced with Mickey’s VERY Scary No-Mask Party

Headless horsemen are not nearly as scary as invisibly virus particles. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- Disney announced yesterday that it was canceling the crowd favorite Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween Parties (called "MNSSHP" or "Menship" by fans) this year. Instead, they're ramping up the terror with an all new "Mickey's VERY Scary No-Mask Halloween Party" ("MSNBC," pronounced "Rubbish"). Now it won't be just Disney villains who are not wearing masks! No one attending the MRCVS will be allowed to wear a mask. ...

(Step)Moms Panel: How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear (Step)Moms: How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?" - Ruslan D., Saskatoon SK Marty: I'm sorry, I've never seen Tootsie. But I like that Stephen Bishop song that came from it. Since you're from Saskatchewan, ...

June 18, 2020 by Marty in step-planDisney

It will look like this on Day One. Photo courtesy Wallpaper Flare.

Disney Parks will now reopen at full capacity, calling crowds a “protest”

Apparently you're less likely to catch the virus if you hold certain points of view. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- As Walt Disney World inches towards its reopening date in 2025, the company is backtracking on its plans for social distancing. The parks first announced they would require guests to undergo temperature checks, maintain distance from people they like as well as those they don't, and immerse themselves completely in hand sanitizer. The company also said park capacity would be limited to ...

June 17, 2020 by Marty in Florida

Disney's new shuttle service to Universal Orlando. Photo by Disney Tourist Blog, used by permission.

New Minnie Vans destinations: Universal, Sea World, and more!

Disney decides if you can't beat 'em, transport 'em. ORLANDO, FL -- It's almost heaven: Main Street West, Blue Ridge Big Thunder Mountain, Shanandoah Rivers of America. Life is old there, older than the trees that dot the landscape of Walt Disney World. The mountains are young there, never growing more than 199 feet. But those country roads will not only take you home, where some of you belong, but maybe even to West Orlando. Or maybe to Mountain Mama's Cafe and Horseshoe ...

June 16, 2020 by Ub in Florida

(Step)Moms Panel: “Do you give advice on romance?”

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear (Step)Moms: Do you give advice on romance and relationships?" - Pat S., Weehawken NJ Walt: Hmm.... X: Uh.... Harriet: .... Marty: <gulp> Baby Yoda: Ub: Hmm.... Uh.... .... <gulp> What? Joe Rohde's Earring: I'm not a "(Step)Mom," but I have been in a close physical relationship with the same guy for over 30 years. Give me a ...

June 15, 2020 by Marty in step-planDisney