Page 90 – Uncle Walt's Insider
A promotional graphic for DIsney's new Coronavirus Dance Parties. Photo [CC0] via Pixabay.

BREAKING: Disney announces “Coronavirus Dance Parties”

It's like the old chickenpox parties, but with dancing! BURBANK, CA -- With the ever-growing news on the COVID-19 pandemic, many public gatherings are being canceled, including NCAA & NBA sporting events, churches and schools. But Disney leadership has decided to take a different path. There will be an all-new offering at all Disney theme parks in the U.S.: The Coronavirus Dance Party. Each park will hold these dance parties nightly. Not unprecedented "Do you remember the chickenpox parties from when we were kids?" asked ... Read more
UWI Step Moms Panel

(Step)Moms Panel: Coronavirus fears PART 2

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] So apparently Harriet hijacked this question and deleted all of the answers from the other (Step) Moms, just to push her "don't go to the parks" agenda. Fortunately, with much effort and at great expense, we were able to recover our ... Read more
UWI Step Moms Panel

(Step)Moms Panel: With coronavirus fears, should I avoid Disney parks?

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear (Step) Moms: There's a lot of fear about the coronavirus, and some experts say we should avoid public crowds. So should I stay away from Walt Disney World?” - Becca L., Asheville NC Harriet:  Yes. Do you have a question for the Uncle ... Read more
A Disney Cast Member directs a guest ahead in the queue. Photo © 2019 Disney / Marvel Studios

Epcot’s Guardians coaster to feature “Thanos queue”

It's like a single-rider line, but with only a 50% chance you'll get to ride. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- Excitement continues to build around the new, completely-park-appropriate "Guardians of the Galaxy" roller coaster currently being built at EPCOT. The coaster, slated to be finished in 2038, has Marvel fans rejoicing (and Epcot Center purists in anguish). New details are emerging about the ride as construction progresses. The attraction will feature the usual Standby and Fastpass+ queues, but instead of a single-rider line, ... Read more
The next Einstein? Photo [CC0] via Pixabay.

Medical journal: Goofy is actually a genius?

Have we been underestimating the lovable man-dog-thing all these years? BALTIMORE, MD -- According to a study published in the New Old England Journal of Medicine, Goofy is not the bumbling fool that we've all thought he was. In fact, he's actually a genius! The author of the study, a fellow at the Johns Hopkins School of Medicine and Spa, says the conclusion was made after carefully studying every Goofy cartoon ever made. While the paper is filled with medical jargon that ... Read more