First they came for the ducks, but I did not speak out because I was not a duck… SAN FRANCISCO, CA — Complete Unbiased® social media giant Twitter is permanently banning the @RealDonaldDuck account from ever tweeting again. Head Twit Jack Dorsey announced the move today. “We try to understand The Donald’s tweets, but they…
![The last Disney fireworks not to be sold on the black market. Photo by Ethically Yours [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/disney-black-market-fireworks-768x403.jpg)
We only make up stuff when we want to start a rumor. (This, for example.) BOCA CHICA, TX — For the first time in Walt Disney World history, fireworks did not explode over Cinderella Castle as the clock struck midnight on New Years Eve. In fact, Disney has not launched a barrage of exploding shells…
![Joe can relax, but the earring will still be hard at work. Photo by alchetron.com [CC BY-SA 3.0].](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/joe-rohdes-earring-not-retired-768x403.jpg)
We suspect it was the source of all of the good ideas anyway. GLENDALE CA — Good news from Disney Imagineering headquarters! Although legendary Imagineer Joe Rohde will be retiring effective January 4 of next year, his famed earring will continue working for the foreseeable future. The earring, which unsuccessfully ran for president earlier this…
We knew it. We just knew it. BR’ER BANK, CA — Sources at Disney+ have now confirmed what we’ve suspected all along. The Razor Crest, the spaceship flown by the title character of The Mandalorian, was indeed modeled after the Space Winnebago, Lone Star’s spaceship in Mel Brooks’ classic Oscar-winning drama Spaceballs. Just a few…
![Clarence Farley, 102, the last surviving person to have seen Star Wars in a theater in 1977. Photo by Marg [CC BY 2.0] via Wikimedia, modified.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/last-surviving-star-wars-theatre-viewer-768x403.jpg)
The only other known viewer passed away last month. SOUTHFIELD, MI — Clarence Farley gets a far-away look in his eye when he talks about Star Wars. The 102-year-old lifelong resident of Southfield, Michigan, a Detroit suburb, is the last known person still living to have seen the original Star Wars movie in a theater during…