satire Archives - Page 168 of 209 - Uncle Walt's Insider
The soon-to-be Big Pile O' Puddin'. Photo by HarshLight [CC BY 2.0] via Wikipedia Commons.

Switzerland sues; Disneyland loses right to Matterhorn

The International Court rules that the mountain and its name are a Swiss trademark. ANAHEIM, CA -- In a legal blow to the original Disney theme park, the Disneyland Resort and Spa will be forced to change and rename its iconic Matterhorn peak. The country of Switzerland filed suit many years ago alleging that the miniature mountain infringed upon its rights as a national trademark. On Wednesday, the International Court agreed, ordering Disneyland to change the name and appearance of the park's version ...
December 20, 2018 by Marty in California
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The new open-air gondola cars on the Disney Skyliner. Video still courtesy Passport to the Parks via YouTube.

UPDATE: Skyliner to feature open air ride vehicles

Makes sense, if they're also going to have open-air monorails. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- The Walt Disney World Resort and Spa continues to innovate in transportation, as new open-air Skyliner cars were revealed last week. Concept art for the new gondola system previously showed enclosed cars with Disney characters on the outside. However, Uncle Walt's Insider can now report that the cars will be completely open to the elements, with no walls or ceiling. And no restraints! "Not just a ride, but a ...
December 19, 2018 by Marty in Florida
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Uncle Walt's Insider Legend Award.

Our own Uncle Walt named the first Uncle Walt’s Insider Legend!

The lucky recipient wins a printout of the photoshopped trophy pictured above. UNCLE WALT'S INSIDER H.Q., SVALBARD -- Because one annual award is never enough, Uncle Walt's Insider is proud to announce our new Uncle Walt's Insider Legends award. And the inaugural recipient is our own Uncle Walt! This award goes out to those who are dedicated to the ideals, the dreams, and the hard facts that have created Uncle Walt's Insider, with the hope that it (Uncle Walt's Insider, not the award) will be a ...
December 18, 2018 by Walt in Spotlight
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N*Sync narrating the Candlelight Processional. Photo courtesy Zannaland.com.

Squee!!! N*Sync to sing-narrate Candlelight Processional

Disney is getting more adventurous with the concept of "narration." WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- Walt Disney World and Disneyland have been telling the true story of Christmas in spoken word and song since the First Council of Nicaea in 325 A.D. [Ed.: Hey, check this before publishing. I thought it didn't start until after the Reformation.] The Candlelight Processional features a full orchestra, a massive choir of Cast Members and random locals who own gold robes, the Voices of Liberty, jugglers, ...
December 17, 2018 by Marty in Florida
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Animatronic Grinch arrives at Disneyland's Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge.

Animatronic Grinch arrives at Disneyland

Just in time for the holidays! Kind of. ANAHEIM, CA -- Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge is still just months away from opening, and we've spotted another audio-animatronic figure arriving at the Disneyland Resort!  As Uncle Walt's Insider has reported, Disney already installed less popular figures from the Star Wars Universe: Jar Jar Binks and Bea Arthur's Ackmena from the Star Wars Holiday Special; old, frozen General Leia; dancing Han Solo; and CGI Grand Moff Tarkin. Stink, stank, stunk Today's character spotting is more in line from ...
December 15, 2018 by Marty in California
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