Uncle Walt's Insider virus Archives - Page 10 of 23

Now Mickey will cry over your dead body! Photo by Chad Sparkes [CC BY 2.0] via Flickr, modified.

QUESTION: Did Walt Disney World reopen to increase Magical Funerals® clients?

Would Disney exploit a health crisis to drum up business? WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- While many have questioned Walt Disney World's decision to reopen its theme parks during the pandemic, some are suggesting a more sinister motive. "They have a business built on death," said Cast Member Jordan from Davenport, FL our source, who asked to remain anonymous, referring to WDW's Magical Funerals® services. "I've been working with the Disney Magical Funerals® department for over a year. And you'd think that when the ...

Madame Leota is pretty socially distanced inside a crystal ball. Is the mask really necessary? Photo by Cory Doctorow [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Flickr.

BREAKING: Haunted Mansion COVID overlay?

You can't tell if the grim ghosts are grinning behind their face masks. UNCLE WALT'S H.Q., SVALBARD -- With fans still reeling from the many changes to Disney parks, Uncle Walt's Insider has just learned of more to come. There are potential drastic changes to the Haunted Mansion attraction on their way, incorporating the COVID virus into the ride! Is nothing sacred? Won't someone think of the children? Our source We received an email from a faithful reader who wishes to remain anonymous. Well, we ...

July 22, 2020 by X in California, Florida

Two bucks for egg salad? Hope it's good! Photo by Khairoun Abji [CC BY-NC 2.0] via Flickr.

Pre-packaged sandwiches at EPCOT Food & Wine Festival

Also, instead of being sold in kiosks, they'll be in vending machines. EPCOT, FL -- Walt Disney World is welcoming guests once again, and that can only mean one thing: it's festival time at EPCOT! This year the International Food & Wine Festival starts early and Uncle Walt's Insider has obtained an exclusive look at the upcoming menus. And there's a special treat this year: for guest safety, all items are pre-packaged! Here's a look at some of the more appetizing offerings ...

July 21, 2020 by Walt in Florida

Dreamfinder and Figment infected? No surprise -- they aren't ever socially distanced from each other! Photo by Loren Javier [CC BY-NC-ND 2.0] via Flickr.

Dreamfinder and Figment in quarantine due to Covid-19

They're normally inseparable, so we imagine (get it?) quarantine together won't be too difficult. EPCOT, FL -- As the parks prepare to re-open, Disney has started to share what attractions, restaurants, and characters will be available. But notably missing from this list is Dreamfinder and Figment! Uncle Walt's Insider reached out to our favorite Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation) for details. Innooooculation, innooooculation... "Sadly, yes, Dreamfinder and Figment will not be available. While HIPPA prevents us from discussing the details, I'll tell ...

July 17, 2020 by Walt in Florida

(Step)Moms Panel: New ways to have fun at Walt Disney World

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear (Step)Moms: Now that Walt Disney World is back open, do you have any advice for having fun there?" - Edwin S., Roanoke VA Walt: Hi Eduardo, thanks for asking. Not really, all of the fun has been sucked out of everything. Marty: Can't totally agree, ...

July 16, 2020 by Marty in step-planDisney