satire Archives - Page 191 of 209 - Uncle Walt's Insider
Disney Skyliner artist's conception. (c) 2017 Disney.

Skyliner cars to include gift shops

Instead of 'exit through the gift shop,' guests will 'travel in the gift shop.' WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- New details have emerged about the Skyliner gondola system under construction at the Walt Disney World Resort in Florida. Apparently each gondola car will have its own gift store, so Disney guests can shop as they travel. Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation) tells Uncle Walt's Insider the concept behind the news. "The Walt Disney Company is dedicated to providing magical experiences for ...
August 4, 2018 by Marty in Florida
Read more
St. Louis adds a second arch, sponsored by McDonald's. Photo by AfricanGeo [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia Commons, modified.

Corporate sponsorship enables second Gateway Arch

McDonald's selfless gift to the city of St. Louis also includes coloring both arches gold. ST. LOUIS, MO -- The Gateway Arch has stood for over fifty years on the banks of the Mississippi River. And now, thanks to a generous gift from the McDonald's Corporation, it will have a twin. "As the original arch celebrates the western expansion of the United States," McDonald's spokesperson Jeremy Burger (no relation) tells Uncle Walt's Insider, "so the new arch celebrates the expansion of America's economy ...
August 3, 2018 by Marty in Other, World
Read more
A churro cart at Disney's California Adventure. Photo copyright 2018 Google / Street View.

Man using Street View billed for ‘virtual park admission’

Disney hails "virtual guests" as new revenue stream. PROVO, UT -- It's a fact of modern life that every one of us clicks to accept Terms of Service without reading or understanding what we are agreeing to. One Utah man found out the hard way that he should always read the fine print. The next best thing to being there? Edgar "Sonny" Larson of Provo, UT, recently had some time to kill, so he opened up Google Maps on his computer. As a Disney ...
August 2, 2018 by Marty in Florida
Read more
TV remote made from Pal Mickey.

Pal Mickey repurposed as TV remote

Batteries not included. PITTSFIELD TOWNSHIP, MI -- A self-described "Disney geek -- well, really, more of an overall geek" from a small town somewhat near Detroit has found a way to rescue her old Pal Mickey. Braidy Abelli, 23, says that the modification was "not really all that difficult." What is Pal Mickey? Back in the Early 2000's, Disney sold a plush Mickey toy known as Pal Mickey. But this was not just any plush mouse! Pal Mickey was an interactive toy, containing a ...
August 1, 2018 by X in Other
Read more
Audio-animatronic of Jar Jar Binks arrives at Disneyland Park.

Animatronic Jar Jar arrives at Disneyland

Everyone's least favorite character will help keep crowds down. ANAHEIM, CA -- Another milestone in the construction of the new Star Wars-themed land at Disneyland Park: the arrival of a Jar Jar Binks audio-animatronic character. The life-size figure of the annoying Gungan will be positioned in the main entrance to the Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge area, interacting with guests, telling bad jokes, and occasionally singing. And the placement is apparently intentional. Crowd control "We anticipate huge numbers of people trying to pack into Galaxy's Edge ...
July 31, 2018 by Marty in California
Read more