Churro Archives - Page 6 of 37 - Uncle Walt's Insider
"Father," in the middle of a racist and homophobic rant, probably. Photo by SteamFan [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia.

Another attraction gets woke – meet the new “Carousel of Progressives”

Welcome guest contributor Vier Eiken to Uncle Walt's Insider! No, he's not getting paid. BAY LAKE, FL -- The Walt Disney World Resort, Spa, Jello Factory, and Dog Track announced today that, in keeping with its commitment to inclusion and tolerance, the "Carousel of Progress" will be reimagined. The newly updated attraction will reopen in May after extensive changes. We reached out to Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation), who was able to confirm the upcoming changes. While full details were ...
February 19, 2021 by Unpaid Intern in Florida
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The final straw? CA governor facing recall after banning Churros

Nothing says "overbearing dictator" like denying citizens their Churros. ANAHEIM, CA -- While Disney continues to box up Disneyland for the move to Texas, even bigger news has dominated the headlines. California Governor Gavin Newsom (D) is facing a recall from angry voters.  Newsom's previous orders, while strict, were at least limited in scope, with only trying to run a small business, restaurant, or theme park banned. The new order is far more comprehensive -- and one detail in particular has the remaining ...
December 23, 2020 by Walt in California
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Images from Epcot's upcoming (so to speak) Festival of Fertility. Inset photo by Uncle Walt (who hasn't learned that our header images are in landscape mode), used without permission, and ©2020 Google / Street View.

EPCOT Centre’s Festival of Fertility debuts on February 14th

This is Disney! There's no  at Disney! E.P.C.O.T. C.E.N.T.R.E. -- Even though the Festival of THE Holiday [X: HEY!] is only a week into its annual run, Disney is already starting to talk about the next Festival coming to Epcot: the Festival of Fertility! Our own Uncle Walt stumbled across prep for this brand new Festival, so we reached out to Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation) regarding his find. The conversation went like this: What festival is this, he asked ...
December 8, 2020 by Walt in Florida
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What Walt Disney World used to look like at Christmas time. Stock photo from DepositPhotos.

Walt Disney World cancels Christmas

He took all their presents, their ribbons, their wrappings, Their snoof and their fuzzles, their tringlers and trappings! WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- For decades, Disney has embraced the holidays, overloading their parks with festive garlands, lights, music, and shows. There were few places in the world that celebrated the season like Walt Disney World. But not this year. In yet another indicator that 2020 really sucks, [Ed.: Are professional journalists allowed to say "sucks" now?] [Marty: Forget professional journalists. How about us?] park officials announced ...
October 21, 2020 by Marty in Florida
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UWI (Step)Moms Panel

(Step)Moms Panel: What’s our take on the Food & Wine Tour?

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear (Step)Moms: What do you really think of the Food & Wine Tour? Sweet, spicy, salty or a little too saucy?" - Carmela D., Dallas-Ft. Worth TX Ub: You forgot umami. Now I want some sushi. X: Give me all the desserts. Actual food, eh, ...
October 15, 2020 by Marty in step-planDisney
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