california Archives - Page 14 of 48 - Uncle Walt's Insider
Remember, it all started with a mouse. Photo by Olivier Bruchez [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Flickr.

Marty’s trip report: Disneyland, August 2020

Come along with Marty as he visits Walt's original Magic Kingdom! UNCLE WALT'S INSIDER H.Q., SVALBARD -- I'm so excited! Our boss is normally pretty tight on money, but after we grumbled about his visiting Walt Disney World recently, he's opening up the purse strings! He said that if I can get myself from Svalbard to Anaheim, he'll pay for any available Disneyland admission pass, up to five days!! Also, I get to write in the first person! Days 1 & 2 It's a grueling ...
August 19, 2020 by Marty in California, World
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Emperor Palpatine, before he died. We think. Photo © Lucasfilm.

Emperor Palpatine died of Covid-19

In spite of what you think you saw onscreen, he had Covid in his blood at time of death. BLACK SPIRE OUTPOST, BATUU -- A short statement released by the First Order confirms what many outlets have been reporting: Emperor Palpatine is dead from the coronavirus. The statement is below. The statement "The First Order sadly announces that our beloved Emperor Palpatine's passing was due to complications of Covid-19. "While it is true he engaged in a glorious battle with a talentless young girl, only to ...
July 28, 2020 by Walt in California, Florida, Other
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Colin Kaepernick, looking quite at home at Disneyland. Photo by Melissa Hillier [CC BY-2.0] via Wikimedia.

Kaepernick’s Disney deal: millions per year to sit on benches

The former NFL player will rotate between Disney's U.S. theme parks and spend time on several benches in each one. BURBANK, CA -- Details have emerged about Colin Kaepernick's new contract with The Disney Company. Apparently the activist and shoe salesman is being paid millions of dollars to sit on benches at various Disney theme parks. Uncle Walt's Insider spoke to Kaepernick's agent, who told us, "It's not big thing for him. He's used to getting paid to sit. This job is definitely ...
July 14, 2020 by Marty in California, Florida
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The Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution is on the warpath. Wait, can we say 'warpath'? Photo Public Domain.

Walt Disney canceled? Name to be removed from parks and movies worldwide

We kind of figured this would have to happen eventually. BURBANK, CA -- Officials at the Company announced today that they are erasing 's name from films, theme parks, and products world-wide. (the company) spokesperson Jun (no relation) shared the reasoning. " was a backwards thinker. And he had a major part in creating things that can never see the light of day again, including Song of the South, Nazi-loving Donald Duck, and cream cheese-filled pretzels. Because of this, ...
July 10, 2020 by Walt in California, Florida, World
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UWI (Step)Moms Panel

(Step)Moms Panel: Walt Disney World is closed? Why?

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear (Step)Moms: I went to book a vacation to Walt Disney World - my first - and their website says they're closed? Really? What's up with that?" - Carl S., Cheyenne Wy Harriet: Just don't go to Walt Disney World. There are enough ...
July 6, 2020 by Marty in step-planDisney
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