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Dollywood becomes Dali-wood. Photo by Todd Van Hoosear [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Flickr.

Dollywood sold, will become surrealist “Dali-wood”

The Salvador Dali-inspired theme park will be a radical change. PIGEON FORGE, TN -- Dolly Parton's country-themed park has been sold to investors from Dubai, and will soon get an extensive makeover. Gone will be the down-home, Tennessee mountain charm. Instead, the park will be renamed "Dali-wood" and rethemed to surrealist Salvador Dali's paintings. Why be normal? "Our investors are big fans of the artist," says park spokesperson Jun "Hello" Dali (no relation). "We've been looking for a park to buy rather than build ... Read more
True Tales: from the files of Stupid Guest Tricks.

True Tales of Stupid Guests: Episode 7

"True Tales: from the files of Stupid Guest Tricks" is an ongoing series, where we share believable stories of park guests' unbelievable stupidity. FROM STUPID GUEST TRICKS -- StupidGuestTricks.com is a website founded to provide Disney Cast Members and other theme park employees a place to vent about some of the idiots they've dealt with. Most Cast Members will tell you that 99% of the guests they deal with are wonderful, but there's always that 1% that lead to aggravation -- and ... Read more
"Mr. Mueller's Wild Ride" overlay of Mr. Toad. Image by HarshLight [CC BY 2.0] via Flickr.

Disneyland debuts “Mr. Mueller’s Wild Ride”

Mr. Toad gets a temporary overlay based on current events. DISNEYLAND, CA -- Never ones to shy from controversy or withhold comment on public affairs, the Disneyland Resort today unveiled "Mr. Mueller's Wild Ride." The ride is a temporary overlay of Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, much like the Nightmare Before Christmas overlay of Haunted Mansion, or the Guardians of the Galaxy or Frozen overlays of everything else. Disney stated in a press release that the attraction will take guests on a "rollicking journey through years ... Read more
Soarin' empty? Repent from the coming wrath! Photo by Uncle Walt; used without permission.

No line at Soarin’ a “sign of the End Times,” says expert

No one waiting for Soarin' at Epcot? The Apocalypse draws nigh. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- It is one of Disney's most popular attractions, and has been since it opened. From its original "over California" film, to the mostly-CG "around the World" version, to its coming all-fake "around the Solar System," Soarin' is a must-see for most guests. Or it used to be, at least. And when our own Uncle Walt found a "0 minute" wait time and absolutely no one in line, ... Read more
Is Minnie still alive? Photo [CC0] via Pxhere.

Publicity stunt? Minnie Mouse very much alive

Guests report seeing Minnie Mouse since her supposed demise earlier this week. DISNEYLAND, CA -- Less than one week after Uncle Walt's Insider reported that a feral cat had eaten Minnie Mouse, some guests report seeing Minnie alive and well in the park. This is not only extremely suspicious, but raises several questions. What really happened? How could this have happened? Here are the possibilities, starting with the most likely and going to the least: (1) It was all a hoax, staged by Disney, in order ... Read more