walt disney world Archives - Page 9 of 136 - Uncle Walt's Insider
Vandals paint Cinderella Castle a hideous pink color. Photo by Laughing Place via Twitter.

BREAKING: Walt Disney World to leave Florida

Rumor is they're heading for New York City, where they can say "gay." WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- The Walt Disney World Resort and Spa and Alternative Lifestyle Grooming Center announced today that it is packing up and moving out of Florida. "It's obvious that our values don't align with those of the state any more," said CEO Bob "Bob" Chapek. "I mean, they have a law now that says teachers can't discuss sexuality with 5- to 8-year-olds without parental consent! Who wants ...
April 6, 2022 by Marty in California, Florida
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Guests tiptoeing through the tulips, as part of really long Stand-By queues. Photo by Uncle Walt, used without permission.

Excessive stand-by lines force guests into the foliage

Pictured above: guests in the foliage. DISNEY'S HOLLYWOOD STUDIOS, FL -- During a recent visit to the Walt Disney World Resort and Spa and Savings Vacuum, our own Uncle Walt experienced incredibly long attraction Stand-By queues -- so long that the lines stretched off the paths and into the landscaping! Because of the recent cash-grab scam [Ed.: Well, one of them] perpetrated by Bob "Bob" Chapek, Lightning Lane, guests at the Disney Parks, Resorts, Spa & Labor Camp have encountered even longer ...
April 2, 2022 by Walt in Florida
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19 little-known facts about Star Wars: Galactic Starcruiser

Our little-known facts series continues, in spite of underwhelming demand! It's a hotel! It's a spaceship! It's a hotel! No, it's a spaceship! Settle down, there's no need to argue. It's a hotel and a (pretend) spaceship! And whatever you think of Walt Disney World's new Star Wars: Galactic Starcruiser, we can all agree on one thing: it's ing expensive. But do you know everything there is to know about this "space cruise" experience? We at Uncle Walt's Insider do, of course! So read on ...
March 30, 2022 by Marty in Florida, Spotlight
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The five second rule does NOT apply to churros! Photo composite by Marty, as is the "comment below" question.

Man throws away entire churro at Animal Kingdom; riot breaks out

Rest in peace, poor churro, we hardly knew ye. HARAMBE, FL -- A riot broke out in the Africa section of Disney's Animal Kingdom after a man was spotted throwing away an entire churro. Our very own Uncle Walt witnessed this atrocity first hand. "I was taking note of a bit of paint chipped off the top of one of the buildings so I could file a complaint with Guest Relations about the state of the park," Uncle Walt told himself so ...
March 27, 2022 by Walt in Florida
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Entrance to Disney, sorry, Six Flags. Photo by Jeremy Thompson [CC BY 2.0] via Flickr.

Top 13 things Six Flags parks are doing to compete with Disney

Can Six Flags overtake Disney? (We'll wait while you wipe the soda off your screen.) What is it with America's non-existent love affair with Six Flags? Truly, they are the parks you visit when you can't afford Disney. The good news for them is that soon, no one will be able to afford Disney! (Thanks, Bob!) But can Six Flags really ever compete with Disney parks? Here's some things they're trying, according to our always-reliable inside sources: An ad campaign highlighting that Speedy Gonzales, also ...
March 21, 2022 by Marty in Other
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