Uncle Walt's Insider upcharge Archives

Citing “too many poor people here,” Disney raises prices… again

Also, the unnamed executive's ringtone was a "cha-ching" sound, over and over again. BURBANK, CA -- On a recent visit to Disneyland, an unidentified Disney executive (pictured) was overheard saying that there are "too many poor people here." The unnamed executive suggested that Disneyland should be like a country club: overpriced, exclusive, and offer mediocre experiences at a premium price. So, as you might expect, we at Uncle Walt's Insider predict more price increases coming to Disney parks. (We also have successfully predicted ...

Personally, we can't wait for the crossover series. Photo elements © Disney.

Ads, no ads, or really specific ads – new Disney+ tiers announced

This article brought to you by Disney+, unless you pay us. GLENDALE-ISH, CA -- Disney CEO Bob "Bob" Chapek is continuing his practice of adding charges to things that used to be free! During a recent earnings call, Chapek announced that streaming service Disney+ will be adding advertisements, but that an ad-free experience would still be available -- for an additional fee, of course. Our intrepid reporters [Ed.: I don't think our reporters have been intrepid since Covid hit] were able to discover the ...

September 7, 2022 by X in Other

Guests tiptoeing through the tulips, as part of really long Stand-By queues. Photo by Uncle Walt, used without permission.

Excessive stand-by lines force guests into the foliage

Pictured above: guests in the foliage. DISNEY'S HOLLYWOOD STUDIOS, FL -- During a recent visit to the Walt Disney World Resort and Spa and Savings Vacuum, our own Uncle Walt experienced incredibly long attraction Stand-By queues -- so long that the lines stretched off the paths and into the landscaping! Because of the recent cash-grab scam [Ed.: Well, one of them] perpetrated by Bob "Bob" Chapek, Lightning Lane, guests at the Disney Parks, Resorts, Spa & Labor Camp have encountered even longer ...

April 2, 2022 by Walt in Florida

In case you missed it, DONALD CAN'T EVEN AFFORD PANTS. Photo by Disney, and various clip art libraries.

Donald Duck joins Mickey Mouse in push to oust Bob “Bob” Chapek

This nickel-and-diming has got to stop. TOONTOWN, USA -- In a statement released today, Donald Duck has announced that he is joining with Mickey Mouse in a push to oust Disney CEO, Bob "Bob" Chapek. We think Donald said, "While the so-called CEO continues to avoid guests and raise prices, one thing that is overlooked is OUR ability to keep up with the rising costs! I get it, guests are here for a few days, maybe a week, and they are able ...

February 10, 2022 by Walt in Other

Disney Parks to rebrand as health care, will accept Medicaid, Medicare

The fact that Disney will now get federal health care funds is "not another money grab," according to CEO Chapek. BURBANK, CA -- In a recent call with investors, Bob "Bob" Chapek, CEO of the Disney Company, announced plans to relabel the Disney theme parks as health care facilities, primarily to be able to rake in federal health funds. The newly renamed "Disney Parks, Experiences, and Hospice Care" division will begin accepting Medicare/Medicaid payments within a few months. Citing lower guest satisfaction, ...

January 17, 2022 by Walt in California, Florida