You put your Elon in, you take your Chapek out... Admit it, you started to sing that.
BURBANK, CA -- According to several unreliable news outlets, former Disney CEO Bob "Bob" Iger is set to take over for Bob "Bob" Chapek as CEO of the Disney company. These reports cite numerous complaints against Chapek, but mainly his overuse of the word "magical" [Ed.: Especially all those "magical" new fees for guests, right?]
Despite these hopeful rumors of a triumphant return of Bob "Bob" Iger ...
He could be in charge of demolishing every unoriginal attraction. Hmm...
BURBANK, CA -- With the recent news that longtime Disney Imagineer Joe Rohde has left Walt Disney Imagineering, ostensibly to go play with cruise ships trains spaceships, there is a rare opening for the head Imagineer. Our sources have told us that the new head of Imagineering will be WDI consultant Chip Gaines.
Bob Weis [Ed.: No relation to Charlie], President of Walt Disney Imagineering, told Uncle Walt's Insider that "while we ...
One person in America still has original ideas.
GLENDALE, CA -- Elon Musk has joined Disney's Imagineering as a creative consultant. [Ed.: Didn't we just say that in the headline?]
Uncle Walt's Insider found that the move came after Disney was looking for some sort of ideas for new attractions to put into the parks, but admitted they were out of original ideas and could only turn to Hollywood. And then they discovered that Hollywood is also out of original ideas.
Disney (the company) spokesperson ...
We only make up stuff when we want to start a rumor. (This, for example.)
BOCA CHICA, TX -- For the first time in Walt Disney World history, fireworks did not explode over Cinderella Castle as the clock struck midnight on New Years Eve.
In fact, Disney has not launched a barrage of exploding shells into the sky since the parks re-opened, after closing due to the Great Churro Shortage of 2020. This has left Disney, the second largest purchaser of explosives ...
The ride takes six months, but the Disney Dining Plan is accepted.
WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- An Epcot ride that's "out of this world" just added a more realistic space experience.
Mission: Space, the spaceflight training simulator, has been dividing up guests into "Orange Team" and "Green Team" queues, based on each rider's enjoyment of vomiting. Well, now Disney has unveiled a new "Red Team" option, pictured above, which they promise will give guests the most complete space experience yet.
Put your affairs ...