You’ll plummet to the sounds of “Seize the Day,” perhaps? ANAHEIM, CA SOMEWHERE IN TEXAS — In a rather odd announcement, Disney announced today that the “Critter Country” section of Texas’ Disneyland Park will be rethemed, but the company would not say for sure what the new theme would be. Instead, they gave a cryptic…
![Totally not a ride exit. Just a gift shop with a really fun and entertaining entrance. Photo by Patrick Pelletier [CC BY-SA 4.0] via Wikimedia.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/disneyland-rides-reopened-as-shops-768x403.jpg)
The rides already exit into gift shops. Why not take advantage of that? ANAHEIM, CA — Disney has already shown that you can safely operate a theme park. Billions of visitors currently at Walt Disney World (95% of them at Disney’s Hollywood Studios) have proven that fact. However, California governor Gavin Newsome (D[redact]ick[/redact]) has continued…
The Uncle Walt’s Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] “Dear (Step)Moms: I understand that Disney is hightailing out of California for greener pastures…
![Construction of Disneyland Texas, probably! Photo by Philip Hawling [CC BY-SA 2.0] via www.geograph.org.uk; inset photo via DepositPhotos.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/disneyland-texas-under-construction-768x403.jpg)
It’ll be so easy to get to! FUTURE SITE OF DISNEYLAND TEXAS — Are you as excited as we are for the newly-relocated Disneyland in Texas? Uncle Walt’s Insider is thrilled to announce that ground has been broken, and construction has begun! And the new location is just where many predicted it would be. Your…
It’s not unusual to be loved by anyone. But it is unusual for our articles. UNCLE WALT’S H.Q., SVALBARD — We recently received a cryptic email from an anonymous [Ed.: Hi Bob!] source, deep within the Walt Disney Company. The source wrote simply, “You should write an article about Disney’s Ribeiro Resort.” That was it….