We guarantee: there will be more or different stuff! (Fact check: true.) ANAHEIM, CA — Disney announced expansion plans for its California parks this week, and fans around the world are waiting for more details to surface. We at Uncle Walt’s Insider, however, have never liked waiting around for official (read: “correct”) announcements. So, based…
Officials were inspired by the new Disneyland masks. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — The Walt Disney World Resort and Spa and Biological Warfare Factory has had its share of odd rules over the last year. To combat the pandemic, park officials have required guests to fully immerse themselves in hand sanitizer, prohibited wearing gators (presumably…
![You can save lots of $$ if you don't go here! Photo [CC0] via Wikimedia.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/09/Castillo_de_Disneyland-768x432.jpg)
Here’s all you need to know about the return to Walt’s original park! ANAHEIM, CA — Thanks to fake Biden’s executive order and impenetrable mask breakthroughs, Disneyland may actually reopen soon! So we thought we’d share with you what to expect when you return to Disneyland. Buckle in, and away we go! Stale churros We…
“Those dolls are packed close together indoors, singing.” DISNEYLAND, CA — Getting the Joe Biden animatronic to sign an executive order reopening Disneyland was just the first step. Now park officials are scrambling to make the Happiest Place on Earth the safest place on Earth. “We took a look at all of our attractions,” said…
![Cover photo: Our first robot president signs another diktat. Photo by WillMcC [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia / ABC News.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/biden-animatronic-reopens-disneyland-768x403.jpg)
Even malfunctioning, it’s still more coherent than the real thing. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — Disney Parks, Resorts & Spas officials have “taken advantage of a unique time in history,” Uncle Walt’s Insider has learned. “We know that there have been a flurry of executive orders being signed by Biden,” said our source, who wishes…