fake Archives - Uncle Walt's Insider
The letters in the word "acolyte" can be rearranged to spell "lye taco". This means something. Image © Disney.

Cancelled no more: Disney+ announces 4 more seasons of The Acolyte

"We had no idea more than one person ever even watched the show." BR'ER BANK, CA -- After a massive letter-writing campaign from fans, Disney+ has reversed its decision to cancel its controversial Star Wars series The Acolyte. Seasons 2, 3, 4 and 5 will begin production soon. The show, which is set in the Star Wars universe, we think, and is... about an acolyte or something (we didn't watch it), was initially canceled after one season of bad reviews and low ratings. ... Read more
UWI step-planDisney

Step-planDisney: Coconut allergies at WDW

Uncle Walt's Insider step-planDisney (Step)Moms answer your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] “Dear step-planDisney (Step)Moms: Are there any drupe/coconut producing trees at Walt Disney World? I’ve seen multiple palms in bloom, but do not know what species are there." – Rosalee M. M., Arkansas Walt: Hi Peggy. Thanks for asking. You can find coconut-flavored Dole Whips in the ... Read more
UWI step-planDisney

Step-planDisney: Our opinion on the coming Oklahoma theme park

Uncle Walt's Insider step-planDisney (Step)Moms answer your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear step-planDisney (Step)Moms: What do you think of the new theme park coming to Oklahoma?” – Chris T., Disney OK Marty: Dear Crisp, thank you for writing. It's good that you have a job where your official duties are so miniscule that they give you ... Read more
The RCID board took a break from their rum tastings to hang a flag. Photo by pwnzyarik via Wallpapers.com, used by permission.

Former Reedy Creek board meets in Cuba as Disney’s “government in exile”

The "true guardians of the Magic Kingdom" await revolution in Florida. HAVANA, CUBA -- Just when we thought Disney news couldn't get any stranger... it has been revealed that the former Reedy Creek Improvement District board, which governed the Walt Disney World Resort in Florida for over four decades, has established a "government in exile" in Cuba. Sources close to the matter report that the board members fled to Cuba after losing control of the district in their spat with the State of Florida. ... Read more
Barricades block access to the Magic Kingdom parking lots. Photo courtesy tampabay.com & pngegg.com.

BREAKING: Walt Disney World closes – forever?

Are they conceding defeat, or punishing DeSantis??? LAKE BUENA VISTA, FL -- In a surprise move in the ongoing battle between the State of Florida and the Disney Company, Walt Disney World has shut its doors - apparently for good! The four theme parks and two water parks did not open today. Guests staying at Disney resorts have been told that they are welcome to complete their hotel stay, but they are only being offered Disneyland tickets in exchange for any remaining days ... Read more