Soon, Escanaba will be just like Orlando! But slightly colder. ORLANDO, FL — Following an announcement that construction on their new “Epic Universe” theme park had been halted, Universal Orlando hit us with another surprise. Rather than being the third park [Ed.: Universal claims it would be their fourth, but a warmed-over version of Wet…
Disney’s getting a lot of details wrong in their announcements lately. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — Several news sources said last week that Disney would not be holding its “Eat to the Beat” concert series at Epcot this year due to health restrictions. But Uncle Walt’s Insider can tell you now that the concerts will…
They just do everything right! PYONGYANG, NORTH KOREA — Amidst global shutdowns of the theme park and entertainment industries, one nation has managed to keep its Disney park operating. In fact, not just operating, but flourishing! In an article published yesterday, the Korean Central News Agency (KCNA) reported that “His Excellency Marshal Kim Jong Un…
“The River Mile” project may have been a front for the Mouse! DENVER, CO — Elitch Gardens (just “Elitch’s” to the locals) was a beloved theme park in west Denver with roots going back to the late 1800’s. Eventually, in 1995, the name (but not the “beloved”) moved downtown, becoming a generic cookie-cutter amusement park monstrosity…
It’s only natural, since Disney bought Zoom. BR’ER BANK, CA — Bob “Robert” Chapek, the once and future king deposed CEO, announced this morning that Disney parks will be very different when they reopen. “I’ve been playing around with Zoom a lot,” Chapek tells Uncle Walt’s Insider, “and it’s pretty cool. Did you know you…