![New signage for the Express Sidewalk to the Magic Kingdom. Photo by M. Minderhoud [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/disney-express-sidewalk-to-magic-kingdom-768x404.jpg)
No handrails planned for now; Disney plans to “wait and see if they’re needed.” WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — It’s no secret that the Walt Disney World Monorail system is in dire need of an upgrade. However, with the Covid-19 closures, Disney’s ability to spend money on projects has greatly declined. Many projects have been…
![Remember, it all started with a mouse. Photo by Olivier Bruchez [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Flickr.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/protesters-topple-mickey-partners-statue-disneyland-768x403.jpg)
No word yet on whether it will reopen in Anaheim or in Texas. ANAHEIM, CA — The long awaited re-opening date of the Disneyland Land Resort has finally been announced! Josh D’Amaro, Chairman of Disney Parks, Experiences, Products, and Spas alongside some random dude named Gavin something, announced that Disneyland will re-open to guests on…
The Uncle Walt’s Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] “Dear (Step)Moms: What do you think of all the theme parks leaving California? How…
The #2 fruit-themed park (behind San Francisco) is joining Dollywood in Tennessee. BUENA PARK, CA — After Disneyland announced their move to Texas on Monday, another popular Southern California theme park is abandoning the state for greener pastures. Knotts Berry Farm will soon leave California and join Dollywood in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee. Knotts (the company)…
The moving vans are scheduled for Wednesday. ANAHEIM, CA — Saying they’ve “finally had enough” and the state is “just nuts,” Disneyland officials have announced that the park is leaving California. The park joins hundreds of thousands of California residents fleeing the state each year. Various reasons have been given for the mass exodus, but…