Apparently Walt isn’t happy. BURBANK, CA — Sources within the Disney Company say that CEO Bob “Bob” Chapek is being visited by the Ghost of Disney Past. Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation) confirmed the haunting, but said it is no big deal. “The ghost first showed up when Chapek started charging for…
Rumor is they’re heading for New York City, where they can say “gay.” WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — The Walt Disney World Resort and Spa and Alternative Lifestyle Grooming Center announced today that it is packing up and moving out of Florida. “It’s obvious that our values don’t align with those of the state any…
Pictured above: guests in the foliage. DISNEY’S HOLLYWOOD STUDIOS, FL — During a recent visit to the Walt Disney World Resort and Spa and Savings Vacuum, our own Uncle Walt experienced incredibly long attraction Stand-By queues — so long that the lines stretched off the paths and into the landscaping! Because of the recent cash-grab…
Our little-known facts series continues, in spite of underwhelming demand! It’s a hotel! It’s a spaceship! It’s a hotel! No, it’s a spaceship! Settle down, there’s no need to argue. It’s a hotel and a (pretend) spaceship! And whatever you think of Walt Disney World’s new Star Wars: Galactic Starcruiser, we can all agree on one thing:…
Rest in peace, poor churro, we hardly knew ye. HARAMBE, FL — A riot broke out in the Africa section of Disney’s Animal Kingdom after a man was spotted throwing away an entire churro. Our very own Uncle Walt witnessed this atrocity first hand. “I was taking note of a bit of paint chipped off…