walt disney world Archives - Page 40 of 136 - Uncle Walt's Insider
Goofy, shortly after being appointed CEO. We're assuming Toon Town is in shambles now. Photo by Loren Javier [CC BY-ND 2.0] via Flickr.

Mickey’s retirement lasts less than one day

Goofy wasn't fit to be Disney CEO. His name isn't Bob. BURBANK, CA -- Mickey Mouse is back. After announcing his retirement yesterday, the Mouse "pulled an Iger" and announced his unretirement today. No formal reason was given. A source tells Uncle Walt's Insider, however, that Goofy was a "disaster." Anonymous sources  Minnie Our source, who wished to remain anonymous, giggled and said, "My sweetheart just was made to be the head guy. Everyone loves Mickey!" "Oh, sure, everyone loves Goofy, too, but not in the ...
June 6, 2020 by Marty in Other, World
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Mickey Mouse. Not Marty. Image by Loren Javier [CC BY-ND 2.0] via Flickr.

BREAKING: MICKEY MOUSE ANNOUNCES RETIREMENT

He'll still make appearances, but he's turning over the running of the company to Goofy. BURBANK, CA -- In a stunning move, Disney icon Mickey Mouse is retiring as the "big boss" of the Disney empire. The company announced today that Mickey, who is well into his 90's, is "stepping away" to spend more time with Minnie and enjoy his "twilight years." The announcement says Mickey will still appear in the parks on a limited basis, but will leave the daily operations ...
June 5, 2020 by Marty in Other, World
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UWI (Step)Moms Panel

(Step)Moms Panel: Did we skip the murder hornets?

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear (Step)Moms: With all the current crises in the news, I feel like we've just skipped past the murder hornets. Are murder hornets still a thing? Are there any at Walt Disney World?" - Miles B., Greeley CO Walt: Hi Billy, thanks for ...
June 4, 2020 by Marty in step-planDisney
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I'll never let go, Jack. Er, I mean Mickey. Photo [CC0] via Pxfuel & clipart-library.

Disney Magic to be sunk, turned into artificial reef

Why don't they ever sink ships to create natural reefs? PORT CANAVERAL, FL -- The Disney Magic is the latest victim of the Covid-19 shutdown. Disney Cruise Line announced today that the Magic, the first cruise ship in the Disney fleet, will be sunk and turned into an artificial reef. With the high cost of maintaining the ship during the cruise industry shutdown, the write-off will help boost Disney's bottom line. I own a share of Disney. Why don't I get these calls? Robert "Bob" Chapek, CEO, and ...
June 2, 2020 by Walt in Florida, Other
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UWI (Step)Moms Panel

(Step)Moms Panel: WDW without Fastpasses or dining reservations?

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear (Step)Moms: So now we know when Walt Disney World is reopening. But I also understand that all Fastpasses and dining reservations have been cancelled. How's it all going to work now?" - Sandra P., Bangalore, India Harriet: Just don't go to Walt ...
June 1, 2020 by Marty in Florida, step-planDisney
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