All the other websites have maps. Why not us? UNCLE WALT’S INSIDER H.Q., SVALBARD — In what can only be described as “shocking” (it’s right there in the headline, see?), a new map of the United States of America provides amazing insight into our current condition. Uncle Walt’s Insider is the only place you will…
![New spray-on painted face masks at Walt Disney World. Photo [CC0] courtesy of pxhere.com & pxfuel.com.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/disney-debuts-spray-on-masks-768x403.jpg)
They’re much easier to breathe in, also. DATELINE IN CAPS — Gators may not be allowed, but now Walt Disney World is offering a mask alternative: face paint! Originally created by laid-off Photopass Cast Members as a way to pay their rent, the painted masks are proving to be extremely popular. Uncle Walt’s Insider talked…
![Cinderella Castle, moved two inches to the left. Photo by Flickr user: Michael Gray Wantagh [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Wikimedia.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/cinderella-castle-moved-two-inches-to-the-left-768x403.jpg)
Why would you even rely on GPS in the 1960’s? WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — Bad data from 1960-era GPS satellites has forced Disney to make minor changes to the entire Walt Disney World area, all 39 square miles. Orlando Land engineer Bucky “Buck” Buckercocktosten filed a drawing with the Reedy Creek Improvement District recently…
![Totally not a ride exit. Just a gift shop with a really fun and entertaining entrance. Photo by Patrick Pelletier [CC BY-SA 4.0] via Wikimedia.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/disneyland-rides-reopened-as-shops-768x403.jpg)
The rides already exit into gift shops. Why not take advantage of that? ANAHEIM, CA — Disney has already shown that you can safely operate a theme park. Billions of visitors currently at Walt Disney World (95% of them at Disney’s Hollywood Studios) have proven that fact. However, California governor Gavin Newsome (D[redact]ick[/redact]) has continued…
Is this necessary? We thought Snopes was satire. UNCLE WALTS INSIDER H.Q., SVALBARD — Dear Snopes Editorial Staff, We know you had to do it. We know that you had to remind the world that we’re a satire web site (here and here). You’ve sworn an oath to tell the truth, the whole truth, and…