Pictured above (L-R): Winnie the Pooh, Chairman Xi Jinping. BURBANK, CA — Sources within the headquarters of The Disney Company confirm that the character of Winnie the Pooh is being “retired” worldwide, at the request of Chairman Xi Jinping of China. Uncle Walt’s Insider spoke with Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation) about…
Sure, you’re sick, but that doesn’t mean you should cancel your vacation! (Or does it?) Much of the world is realizing that the pandemic is effectively over, and we’re entering into the endemic phase of COVID where we “just live with it.” (Note: this doesn’t apply to Texas, Florida, or an handful of other states…
The fact that Disney will now get federal health care funds is “not another money grab,” according to CEO Chapek. BURBANK, CA — In a recent call with investors, Bob “Bob” Chapek, CEO of the Disney Company, announced plans to relabel the Disney theme parks as health care facilities, primarily to be able to rake…
We’re already booking our plane tickets. TOOWOOMBA, AUSTRALIA — The government of Australia has figured out how to counter the protests against their aggressive anti-Covid policies: marketing. “That’s right,” Down Under (the country nickname) spokesperson Jun Under (no relation) tells Uncle Walt’s Insider. “When we rip someone out of their home and ship them to…
![Any risk is totally worth the reduced-price Disney-branded adhesive bandage, right? Photo by freeimageslive.co.uk [CC BY 3.0].](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/08/disney-vaccine-coming-soon-768x403.jpg)
This isn’t just another Disney cash grab, is it? Nah. BURBANK, CA – Disney has won FDA approval for its own branded Covid-19 vaccine, the company announced yesterday. The new vaccine will be marketed toward children under the age of 12, and also to adults who act like children under the age of 12. Initially,…