Florida Galaxy’s Edge scrapped; Residential Street returning

Out with the new, in with the old!

WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — Big news from our Florida news bureau! [Ed.: Nice touch! Makes it sound like we actually have more than the one office.] Disney’s Hollywood Studios Theme Park and Spa is officially scrapping Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge even before it opens. Instead, they will be rebuilding former attractions and original elements of the Studios, such as Residential Street, Catastrophe Canyon, the Honey I Shrunk the Kids Movie Set Adventure, and the Streets of America!

Not a hit

With Disneyland’s Star Wars area already showing dismal crowds after its unenthusiastic debut, park officials have rethought the whole plan.

“Yeah, people like Star Wars,” says Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation). “But maybe we overestimated how much they like it.”

Attractions from a long time ago, but not so far away

“Lots of guests still complain about how the park has changed,” Disney (no relation) continues. “This is a perfect way to please everybody! And the Star Wars construction did have one benefit — with the extra land cleared, we’ll have room for all the former attractions. Not just Residential Street, but the original Backlot Tour and Lights, Motors, Action!

“It’s just the first step towards making MGM… I mean Hollywood Studios a real working studio again.”

UPDATE: Uncle Walt’s Insider has learned that the first show to began production in the reopened studio will be the Golden Girls, but this time it will be live-action. No word yet on whether the Osborne Family Spectacle of Lights (now known as “Soaia Osborne Wou Sänrr Srew sponsored by Sylvania” in the Animal Kingdom’s Pandora) will be returning to the Streets of America.

And it gives a new use for the animatronic Bea Arthur, right? Comment below!

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Cover photo: New name change coming, too? Photo by David Bjorgen [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia.