Our panel was not that impressed.
DISNEYLAND, CA — The highly-anticipated Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge has been open for a day, and the first impressions are rolling in: Yawn.
That’s right, apparently it’s just okay, but nothing too exciting. Uncle Walt’s Insider assembled a six-person panel of first-day Galaxy’s Edge visitors to give us their reactions (mainly because someone here slept late and didn’t get us first-day reservations like he promised, Ub.) We’ll use their real names because thinking up fake ones is work.
Uncle Walt’s Insider: “So welcome, and thank you for agreeing to be a part of this panel. So you all got to see Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge on its opening day. Who here liked it? (Three hands go up.) And the rest of you didn’t? Let’s start with the ones who didn’t like it. Tiffanie, what didn’t you like?”
Tiffanie: “I don’t know, like, it was just so weird. I like Disneyland, but this was, like, really different from the rest of the park. And I was on a date with this guy I don’t really like that much, but hey, free day at Disneyland. He was so excited about this place, but it was just packed with people and kind of strange.”
UWI: “Okay, thanks. Stefan, you raised your hand?”
Stefan: “Yeah, I didn’t have problems with crowds at all, but there wasn’t anything new or special about it. I didn’t see anything remotely resembling the movies there.”
Tiffanie: “It was based on movies?”
Stefan: “Um, yeah, moron. But you couldn’t really tell. It was all cartoon-like, with wacky music playing and a bunch of sight gags that were really out of place in the Star Wars universe. And what does Roger Rabbit have to do with space?”
UWI: “I think you might have gone to Toon Town, not Galaxy’s Edge.”
Stefan: “Really? Dang it.”
Tiffanie: “Who’s the moron now, Stefan?”
UWI: “Okay, settle down. Matt, what was your problem with it?”
Matt: “Well, let me just say, I am a fan of the movies and actually made it to the right area.”
Matt: “In fact, I was really excited about it and had been counting the days until Galaxy’s Edge opened! I was especially looking forward to building my own light saber!”
UWI: “So what disappointed you?”
Matt: “The whole light saber thing. Somehow, I was just sure they would let me build a Churro Light Saber. Can you imagine how cool that would be? But it wasn’t even an option. And worse, when I asked a Cast Member about it, he laughed, pretended to speak an alien language, and played like he didn’t even know what a churro was!!!”
UWI: “That is upsetting. So, turning to the rest of you, you all liked Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge?”
Todd: “I want to change my vote. No Churro Light Sabers? What are they thinking?”
The other two nod in agreement.
So there you have it, folks. Sorry to disappoint those of you who thought Galaxy’s Edge would be something special!
Why, oh why, don’t they have Churro Light Sabers? Comment below!
Cover photo: The thoroughly mediocre Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge. Photo courtesy Disney.