Uncle Walt's Insider up Archives - Uncle Walt's Insider

Reasons why Uncle Walt’s Insider hasn’t published any new content lately

Did our writers go on strike, and Walt didn't even notice? UNCLE WALT'S H.Q., SVALBARD - Faithful readers to this site [Ed.: We have those?] may have noticed a lot of, well, nothing lately. No doubt, this caused you to think "Wait, does the site still exist?" Which would be a very valid question. The answer, dear reader, is, of course, Yes. We do still exist. We still churn out [Ed.: not-so] copious quantities of award-winning satire. So where have we been? Here's ...

The renamed & relocated Disneyland Escanaba. Photo courtesy American Heartland Theme Park and Resort (and Spa?).

Disneyland Escanaba sold to investors, moving to Oklahoma

Fire sale at the Disney Company! VINITA, OK -- Sources say Disney CEO Bob 'Bob' Iger, eager to raise capital for the struggling entertainment company, is quietly selling off pieces of the company. Money-losing parts of the company such as ABC, Freeform, FX, and Kathleen Kennedy are up for sale. And the latest piece of the company to go? Michigan's Disneyland Escanaba. Goodbye Yoopers The park, located (some say) in the Upper Peninsula of the state of Michigan, is most famous for three things: ...

July 22, 2023 by Marty in World

Step-planDisney: Disneyland Escanaba in Michigan, real or hoax?

Uncle Walt's Insider step-planDisney (Step)Moms answer your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear step-planDisney (Step)Moms: When will the Disney in Michigan open? I keep getting different dates. Or is this whole thing a hoax?" - Andrea DeBardelaben, Michigan Marty: Dear Barbie, thank you for writing. I hate to be the one to break this to you... but ...

June 15, 2022 by Marty in World

Uncle Walt's Insider presents Disney Pet Peeves

Our 14 biggest Disney Pet Peeves

In spite of what Uncle Walt insists, Disney is not perfect. (Yet.) Does anyone not like Disney parks? No! Everybody in the world loves Disney wholeheartedly. [Note: Just like on Facebook and Twitter, anyone commenting with an opinion to the contrary will be suspended for spreading disinformation.] But is Disney perfect? Maybe, but there are still a few things that bug us when we go to Walt Disney World or Disneyland, or any of the 37 other Disney parks around the world. (Can you ...

June 25, 2021 by Marty in Spotlight

Epic Escanaba Universe in da moonlight. Concept art courtesy Universal.

Universal’s Epic Universe to relocate to Escanaba, Michigan

Soon, Escanaba will be just like Orlando! But slightly colder. ORLANDO, FL -- Following an announcement that construction on their new "Epic Universe" theme park had been halted, Universal Orlando hit us with another surprise. Rather than being the third park [Ed.: Universal claims it would be their fourth, but a warmed-over version of Wet 'n' Wild is not a theme park.] in the company's Florida portfolio, they'll be building the Epic Universe park just outside of Escanaba, Michigan. Escanaba? Seriously? Escanaba? Seriously. They ...

July 18, 2020 by X in Florida, World