Disney's hyperexpensive hyperspace hotel shuts down! Who could have seen that coming?
WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL - It was a bold vision, even for Disney: create a Star Wars multiday experience so real, so immersive, that nerds worldwide would empty their bank accounts, drain their 401K's, and decide their kids didn't really need to go to college after all. It was Disney's Star Wars: Galactic Starcruiser, a landlocked Florida hotel themed as an instellar cruise ship, complete with cruise ship prices.
And just ...
Disney's going all in on... whatever the latest thing is. Sorry, we haven't read the article yet.
ANAHEIM, CA - The yearly D23 Expo in Anaheim is always the source of juicy news, and as usual, Uncle Walt's Insider is full of it! Here are some of the biggest announcements from Disney this year:
TRON Lightcycle Run's opening day announcement date announced
The new Magic Kingdom attraction's opening date will be announced by September 3 of next year! Or maybe that was when they ...
Pictured: artist's concept of the pirate-...ing.
BATUU, OUTER RIM -- Guests aboard the Halcyon starcruiser had a frightening experience recently in the Outer Rim Territories. A group of pirates, believed to be hiding out at Black Spire Outpost, boarded the starcruiser with blasters drawn and threatening guests and crew.
The Halcyon, a Corellian MPO-1400 model starcruiser (home port: Nassau, The Bahamas), is a 100-cabin vessel hailed as the "jewel of the Chandrila Star Line."
Don't you hate it when your blue shrimp and noodles ...
It's like they're milking a dead horse, or beating the cow they rode in on. Or something.
BR'ER BANK, CA - You thought our previous list of Star Wars & Marvel spinoffs coming to Disney+ was complete? Nay, nay! Disney's going to squeeze the blood from this turnip until the stars fall from the clowns. [Ed.: Will someone please work with Marty on his analogies?]
Here's a few more you may not yet have heard of:
Extreme City Makeover: Mos Eisley
From wretched hive ...
Disney's live streaming service has even more great shows on the way!
BR'ER BANK, CA - Disney+ has a lot of great shows already in the Star Wars and Marvel universes, but more are in the works! Here's a few you may not yet have heard of:
Somebody Feed Porkins
Follow Jek Porkins as he eats his way across the galaxy!
A sitcom featuring a variety of wacky regulars and guests hanging out at their favorite Tatooine watering hole, along with snooty waitresses and a ...