Apparently they found a found a licensed funeral director willing to help. EXPERIMENTAL PROTOTYPE COMMUNITY OF TOMMOROW CENTER, FL — In a move that has shocked a few people, Disney has returned the “Leave a Legacy” monoliths to the front of the Epcot Centre Center. The monoliths, which were removed starting in 2018, have been…
“Those dolls are packed close together indoors, singing.” DISNEYLAND, CA — Getting the Joe Biden animatronic to sign an executive order reopening Disneyland was just the first step. Now park officials are scrambling to make the Happiest Place on Earth the safest place on Earth. “We took a look at all of our attractions,” said…
![Cover photo: Our first robot president signs another diktat. Photo by WillMcC [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia / ABC News.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/biden-animatronic-reopens-disneyland-768x403.jpg)
Even malfunctioning, it’s still more coherent than the real thing. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — Disney Parks, Resorts & Spas officials have “taken advantage of a unique time in history,” Uncle Walt’s Insider has learned. “We know that there have been a flurry of executive orders being signed by Biden,” said our source, who wishes…
It’s 100% effective at stopping the virus, and can be made with common household materials. COLLEGE STATION, TX — This may be the break Disneyland officials have been waiting for! Researchers at the Texas A&M University Department of Biotechnology and Concrete Husbandry have announced a new masking solution that is 100% effective at preventing the…
![At least no one ever dies inside a Disney park, right? Photo by deror_avi [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/covid-19-ward-on-tom-sawyer-island-768x403.jpg)
It’s being temporarily renamed “Pirate’s Covid at Tom Sawyer Island” ANAHEIM, CA — Stymied in their efforts to open their theme parks, Disney has joined the fight against Covid-19. The Disney Company announced today that Tom Sawyer Island at the Disneyland Park will become a Covid-19 ward. Disney has already outfitted the island with the…