Uncle Walt's Insider Death Archives

A dog happily rides Dumbo, caught moments before he plummeted. Photo by Hoifosuhetaizhu [CC BY-SA 3.0], via Wikimedia.

First Disneyland “Bring-a-Pet Thursday” mostly a success

At least one dog went and grabbed the keys on Pirates of the Caribbean. ANAHEIM, CA -- Disneyland Theme Park and Spa announced today that its new "Bring-a-Pet Thursday" venture was a not a complete failure. Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation) told Uncle Walt's Insider, "Hey, we had literally thousands of dogs and cats here, and at least one llama, and most of them had a blast. Even with all those different sized animals, and with ride restraint systems that ...

If he'd stuck around longer, he could have taken advantage of Magical Funerals® by Disney! Photo public domain, via Wikimedia.

BREAKING: Walt Disney has passed away at age 65

So that's why he hasn't been returning our calls. BURBANK, CA -- Uncle Walt's Insider has just learned that Walter Elias "Walt" Disney has passed away. He was 65 years old. Disney, who started with a mouse, built a multimedia empire of family entertainment that includes films, tv networks, theme parks, and many, many plush toys. He is also widely credited with the invention of the churro. The family will hold held a private internment ceremony at Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Glendale, California. [Ed.: ...

October 26, 2021 by Marty in Spotlight

The newly-colorized Leave a Legacy Memorial Markers at E.P.C.O.T. C.E.N.T.R.E. Photo courtesy Disney Tourist Blog, used by permission.

Leave a Legacy tombstones return to EPCOT

Apparently they found a found a licensed funeral director willing to help. EXPERIMENTAL PROTOTYPE COMMUNITY OF TOMMOROW CENTER, FL -- In a move that has shocked a few people, Disney has returned the "Leave a Legacy" monoliths to the front of the Epcot Centre Center. The monoliths, which were removed starting in 2018, have been relocated from inside the park to outside the main entrance. The Leave a Legacy monoliths were often referred to as tombstones. However, Disney executives have repeatedly denied that ...

February 16, 2021 by X in Florida, Uncategorized

Now Mickey will cry over your dead body! Photo by Chad Sparkes [CC BY 2.0] via Flickr, modified.

QUESTION: Did Walt Disney World reopen to increase Magical Funerals® clients?

Would Disney exploit a health crisis to drum up business? WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- While many have questioned Walt Disney World's decision to reopen its theme parks during the pandemic, some are suggesting a more sinister motive. "They have a business built on death," said Cast Member Jordan from Davenport, FL our source, who asked to remain anonymous, referring to WDW's Magical Funerals® services. "I've been working with the Disney Magical Funerals® department for over a year. And you'd think that when the ...

July 24, 2020 by Marty in Florida

Is Minnie still alive? Photo [CC0] via Pxhere.

Publicity stunt? Minnie Mouse very much alive

Guests report seeing Minnie Mouse since her supposed demise earlier this week. DISNEYLAND, CA -- Less than one week after Uncle Walt's Insider reported that a feral cat had eaten Minnie Mouse, some guests report seeing Minnie alive and well in the park. This is not only extremely suspicious, but raises several questions. What really happened? How could this have happened? Here are the possibilities, starting with the most likely and going to the least: (1) It was all a hoax, staged by Disney, in order ...

March 23, 2019 by Marty in California