Hagrid's Motorbike Adventure - possessed? |

Hagrid’s Motorbike Adventure – possessed?

Extremely deceptive concept art of the new Hagrid ride. Photo courtesy Universal Orlando.

Well, I guess that would explain it.

ORLANDO, FL — Shortly after it’s grand opening, the new “Hagrid’s Magical Creatures Motorbike Adventure” at Universal Orlando Resort, Spa, and U-Pick Blueberry Farm continues to be plagued by various issues.

We already reported that the ride’s namesake, Rubeus Hagrid, won’t fit into the ride’s restraint system. We’ve also seen a lot of complaints on social media about even bigger [Ed.: Be sure to distinguish that we mean bigger as in the scope of the problem, not bigger than Hagrid] issues that have caused significant downtime.

Reportedly, the attraction is capable of running with 12 trains at a time, but is only running six. Universal also recently announced that the popular ride will start opening at noon each day, because they need more time to perform daily maintenance. The cause of the issues is largely unknown, but Uncle Walt’s Insider has managed to find out the real reason.

There are some rules you have to follow

We spoke with Universal (the company) spokesperson Junie Versal (no relation) about all the issues. Versal (no relation) said that shortly after opening, a letter was received from the lead engineer on the project.

“Mr. Muggle… no, that’s not it. Mowgli? No, that’s not it either. Ah, Mr. Mogwai! He was the lead engineer on the project, but he left about two months before it opened. He said that he wouldn’t be held responsible, but didn’t say much more than that. After we opened and started having all these problems, he sent us a letter. He said that we didn’t listen, and he knew this would happen.”

We pressed Versal (no relation) for more details, and finally, after much cajoling, she finally revealed to us the secret information.

“Some of this is our fault. Obviously, we’ve gotten really good at making motion simulator rides, and frankly, it’s been a while since we actually made a real ride. So there’s that. And then we opened during the busiest time of the year. But Mr. Mogwai’s letter shook us all to the core. The letter was really short. Only like 2 sentences. Basically, it said ‘You didn’t listen, I knew this would happen, you’ve got the gremlins now.’ So we went back and reviewed all the project notes to find out what he meant.

No sunlight or rain, in Florida?

“Apparently, Mr. Mogwai was very concerned, and said that you should never run the ride after midnight. He didn’t say what would happen, just muttered something about evil spirits. Well, unfortunately, on the very first day, we had folks still in line when the park closed at 9 pm, and they didn’t get done until nearly 1 am, so of course, we had to keep the ride going.

“He also said that the ride should never get wet. But, this is Florida, and it’s an outdoor ride, and it’s the rainy season. Not much we can do about that.

“Lastly, he said that exposure to bright light would make it die. He didn’t really specify what he meant by die, but we thought he was just kidding around. And again, nothing we can do, it’s Florida, it’s an outdoor ride. So far nobody has died. Except ride vehicles. They’re having all sorts of problems.

“So, really, what I’m telling you, is that the ride is possessed by Mr. Mogwai’s evil ‘gremlins’, whatever those are, and we’re not really sure how to fix it. Forget the maintenance guys. The real reason it’s closed in the mornings is so we can get an exorcist in to take a look at it.”

What do you think? Does this remind you of a 1984 sci-fi movie? Let us know in the comments below!

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Cover photo: Extremely deceptive concept art of the new Hagrid ride. Photo courtesy Universal Orlando