Dollywood sold, will become surrealist "Dali-wood" - Uncle Walt's Insider

Dollywood sold, will become surrealist “Dali-wood”

Dollywood becomes Dali-wood. Photo by Todd Van Hoosear [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Flickr.

The Salvador Dali-inspired theme park will be a radical change.

PIGEON FORGE, TN — Dolly Parton’s country-themed park has been sold to investors from Dubai, and will soon get an extensive makeover. Gone will be the down-home, Tennessee mountain charm. Instead, the park will be renamed “Dali-wood” and rethemed to surrealist Salvador Dali’s paintings.

Why be normal?

“Our investors are big fans of the artist,” says park spokesperson Jun “Hello” Dali (no relation). “We’ve been looking for a park to buy rather than build from scratch, and well, obviously Dollywood was our first choice. It has the name recognition built in!”

Details are scarce at the moment, but the park will be a surrealist’s dream. Signs will point in the wrong (or impossible) directions, paths will lead nowhere. There will still be country music shows, but audiences will never know what to expect. They may find an all-trombone band, or Mardi Gras-costumed acrobats juggling to the sound of musical saws.

Refunds

“Of course, some folks like the park as it is,” admits Dali (no relation). “So we’ll refund any season passholders who ask. But of course we’ll do it in the most surreal way possible. They may be paid in chickens, or they could be pelted with tiny plastic statues of Barry Manilow. You just never know what will happen here!”

No schedule has been announced for the transformation, just to keep people guessing.

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Cover photo: Hooray for Dali-wood. Photo by Todd Van Hoosear [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Flickr.