First they came for the ducks, but I did not speak out because I was not a duck… SAN FRANCISCO, CA — Complete Unbiased® social media giant Twitter is permanently banning the @RealDonaldDuck account from ever tweeting again. Head Twit Jack Dorsey announced the move today. “We try to understand The Donald’s tweets, but they…
![The new Hall of Presidents, featuring a Trump vs. Biden Animatronic Cage Fight. Photo by elisfkc [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Wikimedia.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/hall-of-presidents-cage-match-768x403.jpg)
Perhaps this is how it should have been settled all along. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — The Magic Kingdom’s Hall of Presidents is in limbo. With the Hamilton Live: Featuring the Muppets! makeover on hold due to budgetary issues, and America’s future on hold due to political wrangling, Disney Imagineers have been debating what to…
![The Trump animatronic; Inset photo: Boris Johnson. Photo by Foreign and Commonwealth Office [CC BY 2.0] via Flickr.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/boris-johnson-with-trump-animatronic-768x403.jpg)
“How can we pass up the opportunity to create a Boris Johnson audio-animatronic?” WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — Disney fans have been excited about the coming Mary Poppins ride at Epcot’s United Kingdom Pavilion. (It’s apparently still there, even after Brexit!) Well, apparently the plans for that ride have been scrapped. Instead, the Pavilion will…
The Uncle Walt’s Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] “Dear (Step)Moms: It looks like people are still fearful of getting the virus, and…
![Former official campaign photo of Joe Rohde’s Earring, courtesy Joe Rohde’s Earring for President 2020. Photo by alchetron.com [CC BY-SA 3.0].](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/joe-rohdes-earring-for-president-2020b-768x403.jpg)
It’s a bold strategy, Cotton. Let’s see if it pays off for them. BURBANK, CA — Joe Rohde’s Earring yesterday is suspending its campaign for the presidency. The brief press release issued yesterday gave three reasons for the decision. The campaign just never gained traction, due to “the quarantine preventing campaign events,” “difficulty in fundraising,”…