Uncle Walt's Insider politics Archives - Page 3 of 4

(Step)Moms Panel: “How should I vote?”

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear (Step) Moms: How should I vote?” - Kent D., Faber OR Harriet: Just go to Walt Disney World. There aren't many people there without you. X: Dear Kent, It appears that elections in Oregon are handled through a vote-by-mail system. If you are properly ...

Official campaign photo of Joe Rohde’s Earring, courtesy Joe Rohde’s Earring for President 2020. Photo by alchetron.com [CC BY-SA 3.0].

Joe Rohde’s Earring campaign falters in NH after Iowa accusations

Sources say the Earring helped design the Iowa Caucus app. CONCORD, NH -- After a strong showing in last week's Iowa caucuses, Joe Rohde's Earring only finished second in yesterday's New Hampshire primary. The dangly presidential candidate finished with 18% of the vote, trailing Democratic front-runner Cory Booker. The stumble came as news of a potential scandal broke. Allegations have surfaced accusing the Earring of having a hand (so to speak) in the creation of the disastrous Iowa Caucus app. Uncle Walt's Insider ...

February 12, 2020 by Marty in Other

Mug shot of Joe Rohde's Earring. Photo by alchetron.com [CC BY-SA 3.0].

BREAKING: Joe Rohde’s Earring takes Iowa caucuses

Voters want a candidate that can win and look stylish doing so. DES MOINES, IA -- Having announced its candidacy for president just one week ago yesterday, Joe Rohde's Earring is certainly making a splash in the 2020 Presidential Election. Uncle Walt's Insider can announce that, with all precincts reporting, Joe Rohde's Earring has won the Iowa Democratic Caucuses with 53% of the vote. We will continue to follow the campaign. Also, you can follow Joe Rohde's Earring on Twitter at @realjoesearring. UPDATE 10:34am: ...

February 4, 2020 by Marty in Other

Artist's concept of the Great Epcot Congressional Uprising of 2020. Photo from Library of Congress [public domain] via Wikimedia.

AI upgrade leads to brawl at Disney’s Hall of Congress

They should have known not to give them competing programming. EPCOT, FL -- A recent AI software upgrade at Disney's Hall of Congress, located in the dark alley behind the American Adventure Pavilion, led to an all-out brawl between the Democrat and Republican animatronic figures. The upgrade happened before the park opened, and Disney Imagineers were able to restore the original software from backup. Disney (the company) spokesperson, Jun Disney (no relation), shared details on the upgrade. Fox vs. CNN "Software upgrades are routine, and ...

February 3, 2020 by Walt in Florida

Joe Rohde’s Earring announces candidacy for President

It's already polling ahead of Elizabeth Warren. GLENDALE, CA -- Imagineer Joe Rohde is not running for President. But his earring is! In a statement released yesterday, Joe Rohde's Earring announced its candidacy as an Independent for the 2020 Presidential Election: I believe my unique set of experiences in business, government, and philanthropy will enable me to win and lead. As a candidate, I’ll rally a broad and diverse coalition of Americans to win. And as president, I have the skills to fix what is ...

January 27, 2020 by Marty in Other