Apparently you’re less likely to catch the virus if you hold certain points of view. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL — As Walt Disney World inches towards its reopening date in 2025, the company is backtracking on its plans for social distancing. The parks first announced they would require guests to undergo temperature checks, maintain distance…
![Former official campaign photo of Joe Rohde’s Earring, courtesy Joe Rohde’s Earring for President 2020. Photo by alchetron.com [CC BY-SA 3.0].](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/joe-rohdes-earring-for-president-2020b-768x403.jpg)
It’s a bold strategy, Cotton. Let’s see if it pays off for them. BURBANK, CA — Joe Rohde’s Earring yesterday is suspending its campaign for the presidency. The brief press release issued yesterday gave three reasons for the decision. The campaign just never gained traction, due to “the quarantine preventing campaign events,” “difficulty in fundraising,”…
![New official campaign photo of Joe Rohde’s Earring, courtesy Joe Rohde’s Earring for President 2020. Photo by alchetron.com [CC BY-SA 3.0].](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/joe-rohdes-earring-quarantine.jpg)
The Earring has to keep six feet away from Joe Rohde. BURBANK, CA — Joe Rohde’s Earring may have been exposed to a person infected with the coronavirus. The famed Imagineer fashion accessory and presidential candidate is in quarantine, and must keep at least six feet from Joe Rohde. Fortunately, Rohde’s earlobe can be stretched…
The Uncle Walt’s Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] “Dear (Step) Moms: I’ve been Bernie Sanders supporter. Now that he has dropped out…
![Disney's new Lion Tiger King live remake. Photo of cuddly kitty cats [Public Domain. Photo of slightly cuddly Dwayne Johnson by Eva Rinaldi [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Wikimedia. Photo of not-so-cuddly Hillary Clinton by Gage Skidmore [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Wikimedia.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/disney-live-tiger-king-768x432.jpg)
The live action Lion King was a huge hit, so why not? BURBANK, CA — Walt Disney Studios has announced that they have entered into an agreement with Netflix to shoot a live action remake of the hit documentary Tiger King. Starring Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, the movie will follow the life, and eventual downfall, of…